Free Words

Harper to Cut Social Programs. Is Austerity the Answer? Not Bloomin' Likely

2012-01-30T14:16:00.008-05:00

Once again, seniors are being touted as the villains in the political story. If this was a murder mystery plot, I'd say it was way too trite. I have news for the Conservatives (and the Republicans). Older people are very unlikely to quietly agree to anything that diminishes government benefits. The ruling party would do well to remember that a larger proportion of seniors vote than any other segment of the population.

Are Canadian seniors doing well financially? Between the 1990's and the 2000's the rate of poverty among seniors rose according to the Conference Board of Canada and, it continues to rise. Older single women form the largest group of poor seniors. We should not find that acceptable. At the same time, many work places are eliminating defined benefit pension plans and opting for defined contribution plans, or in many cases no pension plan at all. Oh happiness for companies, but not for their employees.

I hear someone muttering, you need to save and put money in RRSP's. I reply, it's good to remember that not everyone makes a wage that provides them with enough money left over to save significant amounts and furthermore, one crisis; for example, being out of work for more than a few months can wipe out the savings of a low-wage earner in less than a trice.

So is the answer to work longer and retire later? That may be a part of the answer. However; it is not easy to find work if you lose your job when you are over 50, or even worse, between 60 and 65. If you do find work, it will likely pay less and be less reliable. We have not yet reached the point where there are way too many jobs and too few people to fill them (except for a few trades and occupations). That is one among many reasons for maintaining and enhancing the Guaranteed Income Supplement for low income seniors. By the way, low income seniors are consumers too. We buy things, not as many things as before but we do spend and that also puts money into the economy. That brings me to my next question.

What is the role of the federal government? If Mr. Harper has his way, the primary role always will be to support business the most. Damn the torpedoes (and the environmentalists too) and full speed ahead says Captain Queeg. Social programs and health care are drag on the economy and cost too much. We will cut costs by slashing in those areas first. Look, look, we have oil and gas, and water too. Don't worry we'll get rid of pesky regulations. And we'll cut costs. Forget Toys are Us - that was last year when we wanted planes and military toys. Our new slogan will be Austerity is Us. Plus, low low low corporate tax rates and lots of business loans.

If the austerity budget cuts are deep and sharp, is that the right thing to do now? I think that as the world works it's way into another major recession/depression, more austerity is not the answer. Governments that can spend, should spend major amounts on infrastructure . (Note that Mr. Harper has repeatedly said that we are in better shape than other first world countries) This would increase employment and boost the economy. When times improve, and they would, then governments can pay down debt.

A footnote of sorts. Once upon a time, actually, it wasn't all that long ago, many Canadians worried about Western Alienation. We kept hearing, The West wants in. Well, news flash, Eastern Alienation is rising and my Canada which does include Quebec, is not in favour of an American style government - for the rich, by the rich. The social contract is at the heart of Canadian identity. At least I think it is.

What do you think?

I'm In First Gear, Again

2012-01-03T14:49:00.006-05:00

It's been a long while between blog updates. Now that December has finally ended and the darkest part of the year has passed; I've restarted my writing engine. A lot happened in the last month of 2011. I moved my friend, The Bear, into a long-term care facility on December 1st. Everything had to be done lickety-splickety [I know that should say lickety-split] , or even faster and thanks to The Viking's help, it all worked out. I was limp toast by the end of the day, but The Bear adjusted easily to the change of location. The staff at his new home are very good with him and I'm extremely thankful for that.

There have been changes within my family too. Life has not been easy for any of us in December, but the New Year can bring with it a fresh approach and renewed hope for a better future.

Yes, I have some New Year's resolutions, but they are too modest to mention in any detail. Mainly, I plan to move forward with my writing projects at whatever speed I can manage, with occasional short side trips and detours. For example; comments on American politics might appear on my blog, if I am able to make them without over-ranting. Also, now that we have GO train service between Kitchener and Toronto, and, now that The Bear is finally settled; I may be able to go out of town for more than a day at a time.

Blessings to all of you for 2012.

A Private in the 'Great War'

2011-11-09T14:06:00.007-05:00

My grandfather, John Wesley Abray, served in World War One. He was one of the many thousands of Canadians who volunteered to enlist and became members of the CEF (Canadian Expeditionary Forces). He joined in 1915 and I have copy of his Attestation Paper issued by the Canadian Over-Seas Expeditionary Force. At that time, he was 20 years old, single, listed his occupation as well driller, and lived in the village of Highgate Ontario. He answered the question "Do you understand the nature and terms of your engagement?" with yes.

John had absolutely no idea what that yes meant.

When he swore his Oath of Allegiance to His Majesty, King George the Fifth and His Heirs and Successors, he also swore to obey all orders of all the Generals and Officers set over him. The document notes that he was 5' 5" tall had a 37 inch chest, a fair complexion, grey eyes, and fair hair. His religion is listed as either Methodist or Congregationalist - the typed-in X straddles the line. The Certificate of Medical Examination says "He can see at the required distance [not listed] with either eye, his heart and lungs are healthy he has the free use of his joints and limbs and declares that he is not subject to fits of any description." A very cursory exam to be sure, but troops from the colonies were badly needed.

Like many men who grew up in rural areas, my grandfather had skills that would prove to be useful during the war. He was already very good shot and belonged to a local rifle club. He was familiar with horses and mules and he was good at fixing machinery and drawing maps. He could also cook and sew, if necessary.

He received his training in London Ontario and then his Battalion was shipped overseas. A lot of the letters that he sent home gave his location as simply "somewhere in France." The field postcards said almost nothing. Letters home were regularly opened and censored, but one letter John sent to his father escaped that fate. In it, he explains that he was at the Ypres Salient and after that he was at the Somme front. A lot of his friends were killed or maimed, or lost their minds.

John had been one of the soldiers who delivered supplies and ammunition to the front every night, after that he had been the driver of a machine gun carriage and later still he had been posted in the advance trenches [too close to the German line to be hit - he wrote].

Eventually, he was wounded but not too seriously according to his letters. He was sent England to recover and when he was well he was sent back to France and then to Belgium. He was wounded again and returned to England. He finally arrived back in Canada in 1919.

He never forgot how very lucky he was to come home. He married his girl, Vera. She had waited faithfully for him to return. Eventually they settled in Windsor. I'm blessed to have lived with my grandparents from the age of seven until I was almost twenty. Although my grandfather died in 1963, I'll always honour his memory.

Who will you honour on November 11, 2011?

Halloween Approacheth. Do You Need "Spackle" to Sparkle?

2011-10-28T14:48:00.003-04:00

The last day of October has multiple meanings for me. It's All Hallows Eve, or Hallow e'en and it's the anniversary of the day I married my former and only husband. There was not a lot of demand for the use of the church that afternoon in 1963, and we did not have a Hallow e'en themed reception or Rocky Horror Picture Show type costumes. Instead, there was cake and tea as befitted a family with Methodist roots and, at that time, a lot of older teetotal relatives.

In fact, there was a fair bit of family frowning about Hallow e'en customs. When I was a child and my great-grandmother lived with us, she terrorized the neighbourhood children by inviting them in and then sternly demanding that they perform a trick before they could leave. Quite a few of the children left without doing anything, and so they collected no candy. I guess that saved some money. And thrift is a virtue, or so I'm told. I truly do not recall ever dressing up and going trick or treating, door to door.

When my daughter was old enough to be out for Hallow e'en she quite enjoyed the experience, or so she led me to believe and when she had children, they also participated in the ritual until they were in their teens. I tend to think that trick or treating should be restricted to children twelve and under, but perhaps that is just my crotchety protestant background getting in the way of what might be appropriate for this generation.

Hallow e'en is definitely a time when people can go all out with their make-up and costumes, the more outrageous, or sexy or scary, the better and that is my segue to - Do You Need Spackle to Sparkle. Yesterday at the supermarket checkout counter, I was possessed by one of those small urges that lead to small regrets later. I bought a copy of Good Housekeeping magazine. I still don't know why I did it and must beg to be excused for such uncharacteristic behaviour. As many of you no doubt know, such magazines can often be perused in under ten minutes. There was one legitimate article about Gabby Giffords (the congress woman). Then there was this faux article - Is Your Makeup Aging You? Hmm, well, all I use is lipstick, occasionally, and blusher, once in a great while, but maybe it could learn something. I did. I learned that there is a face moisturizer or "a hydrating primer ... Laura Geller Spackle Under Make-Up Primer... original or luminescent." I had to reread the promo to make sure I wasn't learning about crack filler and wall paint. If you are going to paint your face for a Hallow e'en party the luminescent base would be appropriate ($27.50).

I plan to stay home and read a book on Hallow e'en night. What are you doing?

If I Could

2011-10-14T14:25:00.006-04:00

I wonder what would happen if I could give Mark Carney, Governor of the Bank of Canada, and Paul Krugman, American economist and previous Nobel Prize winner, a magic potion which they could distribute to international corporate CEO's, international bankers, and political leaders. The potion would be designed to open the minds of those who imbibed it.

And so ... Bankers would discover that reasonable regulation, as proposed by Mr. Carney, would not ruin them. Political leaders would discover that too much austerity, at the wrong time, leads only to more and more austerity, and less and less ability to improve the world economies, as Paul Krugman has shown (NY Times, and books ) and read his Op Ed on Rabbit Hole Economics http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/14/opinion/rabbit-hole-economics.html?partner=rssnyt&emc=rss . What would CEO's discover? Perhaps they might find out that they are frail and human. Although, the jury may still be out on that one.

If I could, I would have Dick Cheney and George Bush drink a potion that would give them the same sensations that being water boarded caused in the prisoners they agreed could be tortured. Do you suppose that would change their tiny minds?

A Dress Code for People with Dementias? The R Word

2011-09-30T19:10:00.006-04:00

On Tuesday, I escorted The Bear to his new quarters. He is now in a secure (locked) unit in the same retirement home. It's not long-term care but it is a safer environment for him. Everything happened very quickly and fortunately I was able to keep him occupied while his furniture was relocated. I persuaded him to visit the roof-top patio on the second floor. He had always wanted to see "where the eagles are" - decorative posts that look somewhat like birds when you view them from the courtyard. Anyone can take the elevator up to the secure area, but you need to know the secret code in order to return to the main floor.

I have only a small amount of guilt about not telling him in advance that he would be moving to a new room. Bears, particularly grumpy old bears, hate change of any kind. To avoid a tantrum, I made sure the room looks as much like his old room as possible. And so far, that seems to have worked.

I was able to have lunch with him and check out the other people who live in the secure unit. I noticed that several of the ladies, yes I must refer to them as ladies, looked at me askance and frowned at The Bear. He was wearing a vee neck tee shirt with a polo shirt over it and, um "leisure pants" aka pajama bottoms and slippers; and I was in jeans, We did not fit in with the rest of the crowd [ I should note here that the base cost for living on this unit is almost $3900 per month and that does not include drugs, incontinence products, and other things ], perhaps that explains the toniness of attire I observed. The Bear will continue to wear pajama bottoms because he likes them and can mostly remember how to put them on and they allow air to circulate. Ahem. That is important when a fella can't remember when to whiz.

Moving on to a completely different subject. The world is in a recession. But ssssh, no one is supposed to use the evil R word. Signs are everywhere but never mind - the VSP's "Very Serious People" as Paul Krugman, (read his column in the NY Times) refers to them will fix everything by imposing more austerity. Yup, that is the answer folks. But don't tax the very rich - in fact give them more breaks - and they'll be gracious unto y'all. Wanna bet on that one?

Until the next time.

I've Been Promoted or Perhaps, Demoted

2011-08-13T07:09:00.005-04:00

Life has been a bit more stressful lately and so I haven't updated my blog for a while. As some of you may recall, my friend, The Bear, lives in a retirement home on the assisted care unit. Three and a half years ago when The Bear was in hospital and extremely ill, I agreed to become his Power of Attorney for finances and for health care. When it was time for him to leave the hospital he was not able to live on his own, so I relocated him to the retirement home where he is now. He adjusted to his new home and did well in spite of his gradual memory loss and his chronic illnesses. But then, about three months ago his memory loss began to accelerate and his physical problems increased too.

He needs more nursing care now, the kind of care that is provided in a Nursing Home, and he is not able/competent to decide where he would get the best care. I was sure of this, but it has been difficult to get the powers that be to agree with me. However, on Thursday when his ability to make decisions was reassessed by a nurse who had never met him before; he was finally declared not competent. Up until Thursday - if by some weird fluke a nursing home bed had become available (He was on the waiting list but not as a priority.) - he could have refused to go. I agree that a person who is competent and fully aware of the consequences of their decision should have the right to refuse care, but The Bear is not "all there" any more.

I suppose it's rude to say he's not "all there." Maybe his memories and his logic are in there somewhere, but he can't access them anymore. His condition does sometimes give rise to unintentional humour though. When I saw him on Thursday he asked me which organization I belonged to. When I said - none - he became agitated and insisted that I must be one of those "You know - Ladies of the afternoon."

I was perplexed. At first I thought he referred to "Ladies of the Evening". I've never been one and now I'm too old to join their society. After a few more questions, I was able to determine that he thought I was a Catholic religious lady - a nun in civvies.

So, depending on how you view it, I've either been promoted to sanctity or demoted to just another religious lady.

I've been informed that the wait-time for a Nursing Home bed for The Bear could be less than six months, or it could be more than a year. In the meantime, I'll keep visiting him on a regular basis. I have no idea who he might think I am next week.

Happy Birthday, My Canada. What Will you Be?

2011-06-30T17:26:00.002-04:00

Canada is .... fill in the blank. Canada is not easily defined, like a teenager about to become an adult we are stilll growing and changing and perhaps that is what makes our country unique

Canada is ... a linking of disparate cultures. A refusal to melt, but sometimes, a willingness to bend toward one another.

Canada is ... a country whose citizens worship many different gods, or none.

Canada is ... a country working towards tolerance Canadians want to believe that our country is ... accepting, open and peaceful . That is the story we tell ourselves. We can make it a reality. It's up to all of us.

Happy Canada Day!

Blink, Blink, Blink. Books. What's My Job Now?

2011-06-17T20:16:00.006-04:00

After my cataracts were slurped away and the shiny new lenses were put in, it took me quite a while to recover to the point where I could focus on print for more than a few minutes. Now fortunately, my visual acuity has improved and I finally have new glasses and a new view on the world. I see my wrinkles more clearly now so I have decided to let the bathroom mirror remain hazy. I also see more dust and may have to close the blinds more often. I blink more now too - I was always a good blinker - so perhaps if I blink and bob my head at the same time I can make the dust bunnies disappear.

When I couldn't read, I spent more time listening to CBC radio One and also paid more regular visits to Tim Hortons. I can see the results of that too, and a future sans pastries has commenced.

It's lovely to be able to read again and I have to take a moment to recommend the BOY, by Betty Jane Hegerat, published by Oolichan Books, Fernie British Columbia, 2011. Hegerat weaves non-fiction and fiction together in a unique way as she writes about two boys, one her fictional creation, and the other, the convicted killer of his entire family (based on the murders of the Cook family in 1959). It made me think about all the influences that shape us during our growing-up years. It also made me ponder how quick we are to judge people who don't fit. If I were giving out stars, it would receive five out of five. It's well-written, thought provoking and riveting. That's a rare combination, I'd say.

I also read Never Say Die, The Myth and Marketing of The New Old Age by Susan Jacoby, Pantheon Books New York, 2011. Because gerontology is one of my interests, and because I'm one of the young old, I occasionally read this kind of work. Jacoby debunks the myth that old age can be defied, or should be deified, and will make every American who reads this book worry about what they are likely to face when they enter their late 80's early 90's and are frail. The American health care system, or lack thereof, will face a crisis of funding. Oh, the wealthy will be able to afford the latest and greatest in new body parts and treatments, but the oldest, poorest and sickest people (almost all of them will be women) will suffer.

Canada will also have problems (who elected those damned Conservatives), however, at the moment we have a one-payer system which is more efficient - and could be still more efficient, if certain measures were instituted. The book also led me to consider "the ethics of longevity" which she examines in the tenth chapter.

The third book I want to mention came out last year. Griftopia: Bubble Machines, Vampire Squids, and the Long Con That Is Breaking America; by Matt Taibbi, published by Spiegel & Grau, New York, 2010. Taibbi is a contributing editor for Rolling Stone magazine. When he began to look at the causes of the huge financial crisis/market crash of 2008, he was stunned to discover how it had happened and how easily it can and probably will happen again. This book was not an easy read, not just because there is a lot of technical information (I had to read some sections twice) but also because of the information that illustrates how the amoral "grifters" transferred so much wealth to themselves at the expense of ordinary folk and will continue to do so. The writer uses very frank language in places so if you dislike colourful swearing, be warned. Be warned also that if you are thinking of investing in the stock market, don't put anything in that you can't afford to lose. Actually, unfortunately, we are all indirectly invested in the stock market thanks to governments, etc. but we can't do anything about the indirect stuff. Sorry. It's a book that will give you a slow burn.

And finally, an observation.

"What's my job now?" My friend, The Bear, who suffers from memory loss and confusion asked me that the other day.

He will be 83 next month and resides in an assisted living facility. I thought about that for a minute and then I said "Your job now is just to be you. That's all."

"Oh, yeah, I can do that," he said.

What's your job?

Five Weeks Until Decision Day

2011-03-27T19:21:00.009-04:00

Canadians will go to the polls to elect a federal government on May 2nd. Five weeks is a very short campaign time, especially when compared to the American system. Although, it could be argued that the Conservatives, who formed the now defeated government have been campaigning for at least the last six months. Evidently, the Conservatives, under Harper's banner (and often beneath his feet) will say they are the only ones who can be trusted to guide the economy and will also continue to say that we should all fear "the coalition." As for the Liberals, their approach will be to try to regain their traditional voters, and new ones too of course, by offering new programs (in a new budget) and by pledging there will not be a "coalition". The Liberals would not rule out working with other parties, and, I can assure you, that if they had to, the Conservatives would do the same thing. I have only a couple of points to make, so bear with me. Point Number One: In critical ways, the Conservatives did NOT "guide" the economy. We were saved from the most disastrous financial fallout by more cautious banking system rules (which the Conservatives wanted to change) and partly by sheer luck. The money that was poured out by the government after it denied the situation for months, may have made some difference, but there are economists who think it made only a very minor impact. Point Number Two: "The coalition." In theory, a formal coalition of Harper's Conservatives and the Layton's New Democrats is a possibility. In practice, I don't think it could work. Harper wouldn't bend far enough to the left to suit Layton. The Liberals and the New Democrats could form a coalition but Ignatieff assures us there will be no coalition. And furthermore, the Bloc Quebecois could not be a formal part of any coalition. I don't know which party will win. My biggest concern is that Harper is a stubborn ideologue. We have had pushy Prime Ministers before but no other Prime Minister has channeled so much power and control through the PMO (Prime Minister's Office). That is too unparliamentary to suit me. And when I add in the fact that the Conservatives were found to be - in contempt of parliament- and the leader of the Conservatives stated that "The Canadian public don't care about these manoeuvres in parliament," well, frankly, I become angry. I'm sure I'm not the only one who cares about how parliamentary democracy should work. Do you care? Til next time. (the para breaks have disappeared - sorry - it seems to be a Google problem)

Eyes Front! Part Two - And Other Things

2011-03-22T12:10:00.006-04:00

The surgery to remove the cataract in my left eye took place on March 2, and so far, the results seem good. It can take up to a month or more after surgery to know just how good. For the first three or four days, the world was quite blurry when viewed through the new lens but things have improved.

I still don't understand why one has to be at the hospital three hours beforehand, but my mission was to obey orders. Eventually; that is, after waiting around in one spot, and then in another spot, a small intravenous gadget was inserted in my left hand and it contained a "relaxing" medication. Then, I had the opportunity to sit around some more and listen to other people's comments about the surgeon and what he was about to do to me. Thank goodness, the comments were positive.The surgery took place on time, almost to the minute. When he started I felt a strong sensation of pressure on my eye but no sharp pain and the sensation did not last long. The whole procedure didn't take more than 15 minutes. That was great because the physical positioning of my head was, well, weird. I was relieved when at last I was allowed to sit up again.

The Viking was waiting for me and I was extremely glad to see him. I'll admit I used the pain killers I'd been given that night. And, I wore my Johnny Depp disguise to bed (an eye patch). Somehow, it just didn't look glamorous on me. And I wasn't thrilled when the top of my hand turned dark brown either. The bruise has disappeared now.

Next week, on April 1, I'll have surgery on my right eye. I'm looking forward to the end result, but not to the first few days after the event. I know my "good' eye will be very blurry for a while. So, I won't be reading the newspaper, or watching TV. It will be radio time at the old hacienda.

Speaking of radio and with reference to the huge events that have occurred in the last several days. I found that CBC radio had the most up-to-date news when the disastrous events in Japan occurred. It's almost impossible to grasp the depth of the calamity and the suffering, Thousands of people have died, thousands more have lost everything, and no one knows yet what the cumulative effects of radiation released from the damaged nuclear facilities will be. Everyone should be thanking the workers who risked/are risking their lives as they attempt to prevent the release of more radiation and stop a potential core melt down. And, Canadians should be thankful that CANDU reactors are designed differently.

CBC radio has also reported extensively on the crisis in Lybia. It's impossible to know what will happen next in that situation. Perhaps the attempt to protect civilians will be successful, but that is by no means certain. I was surprised that the UN participants came to any sort of agreement. That might mean some leaders are learning that this is now an interdependent world.

Til next time.

Eyes Front! Part One

2011-02-25T16:53:00.003-05:00

On Wednesday March 2nd, I'll have my first cataract surgery. The operation takes only about 10 to 15 minutes. If you live to be over 60, or in some cases, even 40, you too can have this experience. It's the most common eye problem. Fortunately, thanks to new surgical techniques the success rate is very high. A small incision is made, then ultrasound is used to break up the cloudy lens. It is then sucked out and a new clear lens is inserted. And voila - the world becomes clearer and brighter, though in my case, not any closer.

My left eye is a "lazy eye." I've always hated that term. It implies that the eye could do better but won't. That's not the case of course. Amblyopia, the official medical name for the condition, must be treated in early childhood. Mine was not and so my eye turns inward at times and doesn't work well with the other eye. It is also has low vision and is misaligned.

So, I chose to have that eye operated on first. I collected all my prescription eye drops on Wednesday. There are three kinds and a detailed list of instructions. My surgeon has done a lot of this work and his office gave me a four colour page in large print that makes it easy to see what to use and when. There are also 10 Tylenol 2's. Wheee! Even one of those gives me very wild dreams, but I have no objection to that. I do object to receiving the meds in a child-proof bottle because I'll have a heck of a time opening it, if I need to.

I'm glad my surgeon is experienced and familiar with all the latest technology. He's not green and he's not grey so he's just right, I hope.

I've read a fair bit about what one is supposed to do and not do after the surgery, but have yet to receive the surgeon's instructions. Apparently, I'll get those immediately after the surgery. And I'll be seeing him the next day, although I don't have an appointment time yet.

I'm trying hard not to think too much about the fact they won't be using a general anesthetic. I'd rather be asleep, but will have to be awake but "relaxed." I haven't been told what they'll give me to achieve a relaxed state. I vote for a heavy duty drug.

After the surgery, I'm supposed to have someone with me until the next morning. The Viking has volunteered.

I suspect I'll have to limit my computer use for a while but don't know for sure.

I'll post Part Two sometime after the first surgery. I'm looking forward to a more vivid spring.

Til next time.

Suddenly ...

2011-02-04T10:13:00.003-05:00

I've never started a story with suddenly or with any other adverb as far as I can recall but I think it's an appropriate title for this post.

January, which seemed such a slow month while I was experiencing it is suddenly over and that means I have only a couple of months left to get stories sent out to journals again. I've received a couple of "good" rejections in the last little while. You know, the type of thing where the editor, or someone on staff, writes a kind personal comment but still says no thanks. So, do I revise yet again? Likely I do. As another writer said and this isn't an exact quote, when you get to the twentieth revision it's hard to tell if you are making good changes or bad ones. That's when the work gets harder. And since I'm an expert procrastinator (need lessons? send me a message). I have foot-dragged most of the time in January and need to buckle down. I'll be fastening those buckles as soon as I finish this post.

Also, suddenly, well suddenly as far as I'm concerned, I'm told I have another vision problem. Fortunately, it can be remedied and replacing my dirty windshields, cloudy lenses, is routine. No doubt the changes did not happen overnight, but I didn't realize my vision had decreased because I compensate for the losses. Since I've always had vision problems I should have expected that with age more would crop up, or is that down? In any event, I'll spend most of my on-screen time working on my stories so, likely I won't update my blog as often.

Have you had any good experiences that happened suddenly?

Til next time

Fun Times at Falcata Times

2011-01-18T10:19:00.018-05:00

I could have called this post 'One Good Turn Deserves Another,' but a boring header might not have tempted you to read what follows and I do appreciate having a few readers drop in now and then. So, here's the reason for the title.

Falcata Times, "The Site for News, Author Interviews, Reviews for Sci-Fi/Fantasy, Historical, YA, Horror, Crime and many other genres" is well worth visiting on a regular basis. I find the interviews with writers most interesting. "Drosdelnoch," Gareth Wilson, elicits fascinating responses to his perceptive questions. He's also very knowledgeable about the kinds of books he reviews. He has reviewed a lot of them and he doesn't hesitate to tell his readers what he thinks, whether it's good or bad. There is also a sister blog site, Tatty's Treasure Chest, where Young Adult and Children's books are reviewed.

It was my pleasure to write a little something for Falcata Times. It's a light-hearted piece titled In Praise of The Personal Essay, and you can find it here

http://www.falcatatimes.blogspot.com/

On a different but also pleasurable subject, The Viking and I have seen a few of the movies that will be Oscar contenders and here are my views. The King's Speech is absolutely bloomin' marvellous and if it doesn't win something big, I'll be very disappointed. True Grit was a B plus movie. Inception annoyed me, a lot. There was way too much violence, the beginning was deliberately confusing and I thought the movie as a whole was not nearly imaginative enough. The subconscious is a vast terrain but, in this movie almost all it contains is violence of one kind or another. Now that is boring.

It's cold and grey and wet outside. That might mean it's time to get back to work on my fiction.

'Til next time.

Resolutions for Other People

2010-12-30T15:27:00.007-05:00

The new year is almost here. I used to make resolutions but I don't do that any more. It's too daunting. And the older I get the more things there are that could be done, or should be done by me. But, I think it would be more fun to make a list of things other people should do.

Politicians - should emit only one lie per day. More than one lie should be punished with a pie in the face. Two lies, two pies - one for each side. More than two lies during any one speech and the audio will cut out and you'll be standing there with pie on you and no way to reply

Celebrities with addictions - should stop talking about their short stints in rehab. More than one "I'm cured now" comment should result in the celebrity being barred from all talk shows. If you have not used your addictive substance for many many years, I might want to hear how you coped without it. If you are not in that category, then make a large anonymous donation to A.A. or N.A. or what-have-you Anonymous and for heaven's sake, shut up.

Advertising copywriter - To the composer of the ad for the "Michael Jackson Tour - Greatest in the History of the World;" you should turn off the computer and turn in your writing badge now. You have gone past the hyperbole limit and your licence is hereby revoked.

I could go on and on, but I have to make a list of goals for myself. I prefer to choose modest goals that can be broken down into small steps rather than making huge and probably unattainable resolutions. Perhaps I should aim to keep any bitchiness to only two paragraphs or less, per blog entry,

To my readers - I wish you the very best for 2011! May you be blessed with health and happiness and every good thing you wish for,

And if you want to add a resolution for someone else, please do.

Another Mary's Child

2010-12-17T17:19:00.004-05:00

The young woman struggled to get her baby stroller onto the number 8 bus because the driver had stopped too far away from the curb and there was a snow ridge she had to navigate. An older man who was standing near the front door came forward and helped her. She parked the stroller in the wheelchair space and sat down across from me. That's when I started to take in the details.

The baby was well protected from the cold in a snowsuit topped by a blanket. He slept soundly, his wee brown face barely visible under his blue wool hat. His mother leaned forward to check on him and tuck the blanket in more securely and when she did, her jacket which was too short rode up her back and revealed her knobbly spine. She wasn't dressed for the weather, but perhaps she was wearing the only coat she had, I don't know. I do know her running shoes were soaked and her hands were blue with cold. After she finished tending her baby, she turned toward me and smiled. At first I was taken aback by the six piercings on her wan face and the faint bruise over her eye and then I returned her smile. We didn't speak. I had to leave at the next stop but the questions that entered my mind are still there.

I wonder if she was going to Mary's Place, the shelter for women and children that's on the number 8 bus route. I wonder if the shelter was full, because it's usually full to bursting. I wonder why she had so little to wear. I wonder where the father of the baby was and whether he cared. And, I remember the story of the babe born in a stable on a winter's night because there was no room in the inn.

Where Are You?

2010-12-10T14:11:00.005-05:00

First, a big thank you to all the people who commented on my personal essay about books which is posted on http://www.seniorwomen.com in the Culture Watch section, I hope that in this multi-media world there will always be a place for the traditional printed book. And now, on to today's subject.

When I telephone my old friend, The Bear, who lives in an assisted care facility, he always asks. "Where are you?"

"I'm at home," I reply.

Then there is a pause as I wait to see if he can remember the city. These days, most of the time he can't and so I remind him that I'm in Kitchener, and he is too. That is the factual answer but it doesn't address where I might be in my imagination.

Sometimes, I'm in two or three places over the space of a day. For instance, this morning I was in Britain during the time of King Arthur, while reading Gwenhwyfar, The White Spirit, by Mercedes Lackey. For a while this afternoon, I was in the Toronto beaches area while revising one of my short stories. This evening, if I return to the other book I'm reading, I'll be in North Carolina. I sure do get around. Just yesterday, I spent a brief time in purgatory when I received a Notice of Reassessment from the Revenue Canada Agency, but I was able to escape.

I also spend time in the land of daydreams where anything can happen. I like being there.

Where would you like to be?

Suits and Scruffs And Other Folk - Fast Times at the Local Coffee Shop

2010-11-25T14:12:00.004-05:00

As I've mentioned in the past, I live a short block away from the nearest TH coffee shop/ice cream emporium. While I have limited my visits (cut back on my habit), I still go there once or twice a week, okay, sometimes three times a week. The experience varies.

During work hours, I often see lawyers, judges, police officers, and "the accused," because the Provincial Offences Court house is across the street from the shop. It's amusing to see young men who are totally uncomfortable in boring clothes with no street cred, and hair that has obviously been chopped off only hours before. I imagine their lawyers have counselled them to shape-up and behave with discretion in court. I wonder what they do after their cases are heard. Do they rush home and stash the offensive clothes at the back of the closet, or throw them on the floor, or are they magically changed by their new apparel ? I'll never know, but I like to speculate.

A lot of seniors frequent the TH coffee shop too. One man, staff have told me he comes in every afternoon, orders chili and coffee every time. I'd like to know his secret. How can he eat chili, top it off with strong TH coffee and avoid heartburn? Maybe if I offered him a small bribe, he would tell me. Yes, there are antacids and Beano and so on, but I have a sneaking suspicion he uses none of those remedies. Maybe he has a magic amulet.

I'm most fascinated by the snippets of conversation I overhear without trying. A couple of examples from the many:

"I told him, don't ever, EVER do that again, or I'll ...." and she drifted out of earshot.
I wanted to follow her and say " What? You'll do what? I have to know. It could be a story"

"And she was all, like, you know, Miss Innocence, and I said, like ...." and I couldn't hear the rest. I'm nosey, but I couldn't ask her, that would be rude. Maybe I'll make up a story instead because I rather like "Miss Innocence" it would work as part of a title.

I'd better go now and find my Christmas sheet music. My "magic fingers" have been asked to play at the annual condo party and if they are going to be magical, they had better practice.

Till next time.

Politi-speak 101 - Free Translations

2010-11-19T17:09:00.004-05:00

It's dark, it's dreary, and I need to do something silly. So here are some politi-speak translations for you.

Let me be perfectly clear.
Translation: 1. I am about to say something you will not like and I will lie about it now and also later.
2. I am about to present an outstanding example of bafflegab which you are free to quote at length.
3. I like to throw this phrase in whenever I need a brief pause for breath. Don't interrupt.

I have not now, nor have I ever...
Translation: I'm sure you'll never find out about it, if I bribed the right guy.

The deficit is under control.
Translation: 1. It's under some country's control - China's perhaps? We don't know and you don't need to know.
2. We have these gorgeous gas guzzling cars for sale

The cost of the G8 summit was reasonable given the possibility of terrorism.
Translation: We want to keep our Muskoka voters happy.

The cost of the G20 summit was reasonable given the possibility of terrorism.
Translation: We don't care about Toronto, there are not enough Conservative voters in the 416 dialing area.
2. We don't care about Toronto
3. We don't care about Ontario. It's run by Liberals

Our troops will leave Afghanistan in 2011.
Translation: 1. What? Who said that?
2. Oh come now, they won't be soldiers, they'll be trainers. Don't worry, be happy.

Do you want the government to be controlled by separatists?
Translation: 1. We will keep up this fear mongering until you believe us. It's a great distraction and works at least 50% of the time on 38% of the people.
2. Why can't you just be quiet and let us get on with ruining, oops! running the country.

Th th that's all folks. Til the next time.

Literary Success and the Small Press / Publisher

2010-11-13T13:37:00.003-05:00

Recently, Joanna Skibsrud's book, The Sentimentalists, was awarded the prestigious Scotiabank Giller Prize. That's a big literary deal here in Canada. Winning 'the Giller' pretty much guarantees that sales will go skyward. As a result, the small press/publisher, Gaspereau Press which is based in Nova Scotia cannot meet the demand for the novel. Gaspereau Press is committed to "reinstating the importance of the book as a physical object" and print and bind their own books.

I understand that arrangements are being made to print the book elsewhere in order to fulfill the demand. Gaspereau Press has been criticized for not responding quickly. Here's my question and I think it's very relevant. Would a larger publisher have accepted the book in the first place? I do wonder about that.

They Didn't Know - Thoughts for Remembrance Day

2010-11-07T13:10:00.007-05:00

It's Veterans' week and Remembrance Day is next Thursday. As usual, I'll attend the ceremonies at the local cenotaph. It's one small simple way to show some respect to all Canadian veterans. Perhaps some of the words below are another way of paying my respects.

In 1914, when World War I began, Canada had a population of 7,879,000. A total of 619,000 Canadians joined the armed forces. Over 60,000 of them died.

They didn't know where they would be fighting, that was confidential.

They didn't know that trench warfare could mean seeing your best friend blown up beside you and then staying in that muddy hole with the dead body for a week.

They didn't know that some generals would see the lower ranks as cannon fodder.

They didn't know that they would receive defective guns that could kill them and not the enemy

They didn't know that their family could be charged for the blanket used to bury them.

At the start of World War II, Canada had a population of 11,267,000 and 1.1 million Canadians joined the armed forces during the course of the war. Over 45,000 of them were killed and 54,600 were wounded.

They didn't know that they too, could expendable.

They didn't know that they could end up in a prisoner of war camp in the Pacific, or in a concentration camp in Germany.

In the Korean conflict, 416 Canadians were killed.

They didn't know that the Canadian government would refuse to acknowledge their contribution or provide them with veterans benefits, for years.

121 Canadian peacekeepers have been killed while on duty.

They didn't know that so many people would forget about them.

To date 152 Canadian soldiers have been killed in Afghanistan.

They didn't know that it would be impossible to recognize the enemy.

So many soldiers have died and many more have been wounded and yet, our government does not provide today's wounded veterans with the long-term support they need. I am ashamed.

I'm also disgusted that I have not received any response to my letter about this issue from my Member of Parliament. I hope that the pressure being applied by veteran's groups and others will eventually result in a better outcome.

What will you do on November 11th?

Freelance writing - Fame, Perhaps, but Seldom Fortune

2010-10-22T19:16:00.005-04:00

Once in a while, I visit Waterloo's independent bookstore because they have a very eclectic selection of magazines and books. Earlier this month, I picked up a copy of the Ryerson Review of Journalism. One of the articles, "Battle Ready," is about the struggles of freelance writers for magazines. I use the word struggles advisedly. You won't get rich writing for magazines, you might, with luck and hard work, manage to subsist. Here's some of the info in the article that I found fascinating. In 1980 (using a phone, typewriter and tape recorder) - Typical rate for a feature article in a major magazine: $1.00 per word, Gold National Magazine Award value $1,000. In 2010 (using phone, computer, more software, printer, scanner, photocopier, digital recorder, transcription software, online services) - Typical rate for a feature article in a major magazine $1.00 per word, Gold National Magazine Award value $1,000.

And then, to add further insult to the already injured and probably impecunious writer's lot magazine publishers want writers to sign away more of the rights to their work. "Even when they pay writers reasonably for print pieces, some publishers are demanding digital and cross-platform reproduction rights without additional compensation." But wait - there's more (shades of those horrid gadget commercials) and it's even worse. Transcontinental Media which publishes some leading Canadian magazines introduced a document "that basically stripped contributors of virtually any control over their work, gave the publisher almost unlimited opportunity to reuse material -- and worse, would apply to all future pieces" (for them).

Some Canadian professional freelance writers have banded together to try to improve the situation. That will be a hard uphill battle since magazines often struggle to survive and there are many writers who are willing to take less for their work and cede all rights, just to get a foot in the door and their by-line in a national magazine.

As an occasional freelance writer who doesn't write for magazines, I am fortunate to have a specialty and to have a client who insists on paying me a good rate for my work, when she needs me. I'm also fortunate that I have a small but steady income from other sources. Once, I was solicited by an online publication similar to Suite 101 but I decided against it. Sites like that pay the writer a pittance only if the site generates advertising-friendly traffic. I agree with Kim Pittaway (very experienced freelance writer and writing teacher) who says "...with the students I teach, I tell them that they are better off creating their own sites and doing work that is distinctive and engaging to them and their readers."

It's an article well worth reading in full.

Now, I should probably get back to working on my short stories.

I Could Ask a Thousand Questions

2010-09-17T19:23:00.004-04:00

But, I'll start with three.

On Monday, I received a personal rejection note for one of my short stories. It contained several compliments and ended with "a great story." Okay then, I'd like to ask why did you reject it? Of course that is not possible, but I take comfort from the words of Saul Bellow - "rejections ... teach a writer to rely on his own judgment and to say in his heart of hearts, 'To hell with you.' " And another writer friend recommends a short cry followed by storming another bastion. That could work. And, the story was a sim sub, so perhaps another publication will be moved by it enough to say yes.

On Wednesday, I attended a Regional Council meeting, because there was to be a discussion and presentations about the proposed federal legislation which would abolish the long gun registry. The Council heard from several presenters who support the need for the registry and a few people who want it abolished. The men, yes, they were all men, who wanted to do away with the long gun registry didn't hesitate to denigrate expert opinions, and to try to pit rural Canadians against urban Canadians. I could have asked them a thousand questions, but there was no time. However, I think the essential question is - Why shouldn't owners of long guns have to licence and register their deadly weapons? If you want to own a gun, you must take responsibility for it and must obey the law. If you can't afford the fees, then don't buy the gun, or guns. In Canada, the Supreme Court has ruled that owning a gun, bearing arms, is NOT a right but a privilege. Why is that so hard for some people to accept?

And now that the weather has become cooler and it is possible to do many things that were not possible during the extreme heat - why does my body want two naps per day and a good night's sleep too? It's 8 p.m. and it's dark, so I'll think about that tomorrow.

Do you have a question for which I can provide a frivolous, or even a serious answer?

Haunted

2010-08-19T14:45:00.006-04:00

In the weeks following my brother's death, his 'remains' - what was left of his body after the undertakers turned him into a waxen effigy - have appeared in my dreams several times. Some burial customs give me the ultimate creeps and I have scribbled a few phrases about John which may form a type of free verse/poem, eventually. After a time, I hope this image of him will fade. I'm trying to help the process by looking at pictures of him when he was alive.

Some days ago, I wrote a personal essay that might become funny, but it's very clunky at the moment and needs a lot of work. So, I decided, after stabbing at it repeatedly with my revision pitchfork, to leave it for a while and return to an old story that needed to be fine-tuned and sent out again. I was more successful with that venture, and the story is now in the mail.

When I took the envelopes to the post office to be weighed in order to determine the correct postage for sending them to the United States, the clerk informed me that one of the zip codes was invalid. What the hell? went through my mind but, since I'm a polite Canadian, I didn't say it. Why do our postal service people enter those zip codes in the computer? Who needs that information and why do they need it? In any event, I told the clerk to enter only the first five numbers of the code and the computer accepted the info and produced a stamp label. With all that meticulous attention to detail, my MS is almost certain to go to the right country.

And speaking of countries, okay I wasn't really, but I need to pretend there's continuity here, I'm disappointed in the people that run ours. Members of the Canadian armed forces have a long and honourable record, and our government says it supports our troops. But our veterans disagree and so does the Veterans Affairs Ombudsman. The Ombudsman will soon lose his job. I hope that the injustices he has pointed out will be addressed and not forgotten. A paltry lump sum payment does not adequately provide for veterans whose wounds, physical, and or psychological can have long-term effects on them and on their families. I also hope that veterans, old and young, continue to speak out about this. I am writing a letter to my Member of Parliament. He is a Conservative and I expect a pablum-like response. Possibly, the PMO has already given him a form letter to send out to grumblers like me.

I think I'll go to Timmys now and listen to the grumblers there. Maybe they have a different topic.

'Til next time.

Yay! It Works. - Wait, No, It Doesn't.

2010-08-03T06:18:00.007-04:00

When my computer crashed and I endured more than a week without it, I noticed how much time I spend doing stupid things on the Internet. I realize I'm not the first person to discover this. I also found out that computers have capacitors that become incapacitated. I'm told it's a common problem, but that made me angry. Capacitors have been around for a long time so why can't someone design one that is more durable? I suspect the answer is - we need to sell more computers, more often. Why should I be thankful that my computer innards managed to survive to the ripe old age of six years (likely equal to 110 human years)? See "we need to sell more computers ...".

In any event, the tech guys at Kober, a reputable local firm, were able to install my old hard drive, documents intact, into a new system that uses Windows 7. Update - But, I can't change or move any of my old documents. Waah!. So, I have three drives now. My sexy new black box boots up faster than my coffee maker can prepare my first cup. That's wonderful. However, my new technology isn't compatible with my old laser printer - that's not so wonderful. And, Outlook Express is no longer available so all my old emails have gone to .... somewhere.... email Shangrilah perhaps. A Bell tech in Mumbai told me they "might" be able to recover them but they would need permission from a supervisor. I will ask them again when I'm in the right frame of mind to let them take over my computer. I hate to relinquish control.

Maybe I should be glad for any forward movement at all, because it seems the dog days of summer have been with us since mid-June and the heat shows no sign of letting go. It has provided me with many excuses though. It was and is too hot to take out the windows and clean them, too hot to get the ladder out and clean the venetian blinds, and too hot to crawl around on the floor and spot clean the carpet. Yes, I have air conditioning, but hydro costs just went up 15% and I'm conserving energy, mainly my energy, because I haven't had much to spare. And furthermore, I've decided that major cleaning might as well wait until autumn now. There will be a lot of construction taking place in the neighbourhood, so as long as I can see out the windows, there's no rush and I'll try to take my mother's advice. The dust will be there after you're gone so - don't fuss.

Don't fuss is a good motto, I think. Maybe I can live up to it, someday. In the meantime, the shiny black box has to go back to the guys who installed the new drive and the new operating system, so they can to fix it and with luck, I can access my old documents. I do have hard copies of my stories and my novel drafts, so if all else fails, I can re-enter them. I sure hope that won't be necessary. Someone could compile a whole volume of short stories based on computers gone wild.

Do you have a computer horror story?

Hey Kiddo!

2010-07-12T18:48:00.003-04:00

I was going to say "Dear John" but that wouldn't match your personality, even though you were a dear and loving father and husband. It's - hey kiddo - that reminds me of that far-off time when we were young. Sometimes you called me sis, but more often you called me kiddo, just as you did when I saw you for the last time.

Before we hit our teens we spent time in the basement, playing hockey on the concrete floor and using the cold cellar door as the goal opening. Neither of us was any good at it. But you made more goals than I did. I could say I let you, but it's not true. I didn't give my baby brother any hockey breaks.

When you reached those heady teenage years you were a prodigious sleeper, like many another teenage boy. And you could hold conversations while in the land of nod. You also talked when you dreamed. I think that's how mom knew you were keeping Playboy magazines under your mattress. She told me they were there and that she would not remove them, because if she did you might find something worse and because maybe, just maybe, you were also reading the articles.

When I married, we went our separate ways but sometimes you communicated by letter. You often offered advice and you were serious, even pompous at times. We seldom agreed about any important issues, but that doesn't matter much now. I'm old enough to laugh at some of my youthful opinions, and some of yours too.

Laughter is something you were always good at. Even when you were close to the end of your life, you joked with us about your jaundice making you eligible to play Big Bird.

And, it's very likely you would have laughed if you saw me going from pay phone to pay phone in the Windsor train station, looking for a phone book that didn't have the taxi service listing torn out. It took me twenty minutes to get smart, call directory assistance and twist the operator's arm when I couldn't think of a local taxi company name. A dark variation of "get me to the church on time" played in my head. I did arrive at the funeral home on time, thanks to my daughter. I'm sorry she didn't have the opportunity to know you better at first hand, but I promise to share my memories of you with her and with her children. I know your spirit lives on and if there is a bridge game in the after world, you are dealing the cards. You can teach me when I get there.

'til then.

Diane

Birthday Thoughts from a Word Nerd

2010-06-26T05:41:00.002-04:00

My birthday celebration started a day early because my grandson's birthday, (he's 18 now - yoiks!) is the day before mine. I enjoyed Frankie's cotton candy flavoured ice cream cake and didn't have cake on my natal day. Instead, I ate the chocolate bar I received at Frank's birthday party. Everyone should be able to have chocolate for breakfast at least once a year.

I went for a walk on my birthday and stopped in at a downtown bookstore. I had intended to buy the latest issue of The New Yorker, but the latest issue features 40 writers under 40. I'm 67 now and I didn't want to be amazed by all the young talent when I haven't amazed anyone yet, and besides, I bet there's a lot of angst in there, so I purchased a Harper's magazine instead. Then, I took myself out for lunch.

Word nerds love books and I received 'Bird by Bird" from my friend Lori Hahnel and a gift certificate for Chapters/Indigo from my daughter, I'm delighted by both presents and can't wait to visit the local Chapters store, maybe we will be able to do that next week. The Viking tells me that there is a reading lamp in my future and I must choose the one I like the best. That will be fun.

On my birthday, I also spent some time in meditation. I send my brother love and light every day and hope that his leave-taking from this world will be peaceful. So, celebration and sorrow are intertwined this year.

And in the midst of all this, a story is nudging me and may emerge when it is ready.

Yes, I Did. No, I Didn't.

2010-06-04T10:36:00.003-04:00

Earlier in the week, I had an idea for a light-hearted personal essay, so I drafted it, reworked it a couple of times, and finally sent it to my friend, Lori Hahnel, who kindly looked it over for me. Then, I submitted the essay to http://www.seniorwomen.com/ and the site's editor tells me it will be published sometime in next week or so. It's titled "Why Not Take The Slow Lane?" I'll add a link to the page here, when I have it, or you can look at my other essays, reviews and articles on the site by clicking on my name under authors. So, yes, I did make some headway this week.

On the other hand, no, I didn't get back to work on a different, and, goddess be with me, better Chapter One for the third draft of my novel. Instead, I've spent most of the latter part of this week working on various things that have an impact on the health of my friend, The Bear. Life has a habit of interfering with my plans and no doubt with yours too. In any event, things are almost sorted, so next week should offer me some more writing time.

Here's an almost pop culture question. Maybe I can think of a prize for the person who provides the most amusing answer, or answers.

What connects Eve Dallas, who is married to Rourke, and Tempe(erance) Brennan, who is not married to Ryan?

Technology - Our Fickle Friend?

2010-05-28T06:58:00.008-04:00

On Wednesday, my telephone began to act strangely. At first, I didn't realize anything was wrong with it. There was a brief half-ring and then nothing. When I picked up the phone, there was a dial tone. That happened three or four times. My Internet connection which uses the telephone line, worked so I thought there was no problem. But - I didn't hear from The Viking. He always checks in with me by phone at around 11 a.m. So, I called him.

"Your phone's not working," he said.
"Uh-oh."

I called B*ll Canada , and after a horrendously long wait and repeated recorded assurances that "your call is important to us," my call was answered by a person.

"We can send a service tech between noon and 6 today. If the problem is in your equipment, there will be an $89.00 charge, plus tax" he said.
"Uh-oh."

That long time-frame conflicted with my previously made plans. So, I agreed that the technician could come on Thursday between 8 a.m. and noon. (Why can't they have two-hour time windows?)

He arrived at 10:45 and set to work.
"Where's the main telephone jack?" He asked.
"Uh-oh."

I wasn't sure. I know there are three jacks in my apartment. All of them are behind furniture. He checked the one behind my bed. That wasn't the main jack and since it was connected to the jack behind filing cabinet, both were ruled out of contention. There's also a jack behind the china cabinet.

"I never use that one," I pleaded.
"Well, " the tech said "it could be the main one."
"Uh-oh."

The china cabinet is filled with china and crystal and couldn't be moved unless it was emptied.

Then - fortunately, I had an intuitive flash.
"There's a weird thingie in the front call closet. It doesn't look like the usual phone jack cover, but maybe the line comes in there."

Thank goodness I was right. Then I held my breath while the technician wriggled and jiggled - the lines inside the box. He explained that in an old building like this one (old? It was built about 25 years ago) sometimes lines inside the conduit touch other lines, or something.

"Oh."

I pictured the lines groping each other in the dark. Yes, sometimes my imagination gets me into trouble.

Then he tested the line by calling my number with his cell phone. It worked.

So, now I'm reconnected with the world. However, I worry about what those pesky lines are up to, down there, where no one can see them.

I also worry about what I'd do if the phone line died and couldn't be repaired. I could get a cell phone but I would lose my current Internet service provider. That would be a huge pain in the neck. I might have to consider Internet connection through the cable company. That would be more expensive.

Technology is a wonderful thing, when it works, and our dependence on it ever increaseth. But it can be fickle.

Do you have a technology story?
p.s. I had planned to write about the horrendous cost of the G-8 and G-20 meetings, and about Harper's continuing disregard for Parlimentary democracy but at the moment, I am too enraged to comment on those issues. So, you are safe from another rant, for now.

Beep, beep. Beep, beep.

2010-05-14T16:54:00.008-04:00

It was a weird week. But then, weird weeks are becoming quite frequent events around here. I finished my pen-for-hire assignment at 11 a.m. on Tuesday. It was due Tuesday afternoon. Nope, I'm not a slacker, my client always has last minute stuff to add. The weird thing about these writing projects is that I never see the final product. I send the parts that I write and edit to my client by email, more sections are added by the architect, and other folks. The resulting document is sent to a typist who does all the special formatting (yay for that) and then it is copied and distributed to the relevant decision-makers. Sometime in the future, I may learn the result.

I had hoped not to worry about plumbing for quite some time, because I have already made a big money sacrifice to appease the plumbing gods. However my kitchen sink had a go-slow tantrum. An application of Drano and dire threats have forced it to behave but I won't turn my back on it, lest it decide to spit at me. This was also the week I decided to wash the bathroom walls and ceiling and my arms have not forgiven me yet.

The Tim Horton's outlet, which is less than two blocks from my apartment has signs up that say Cold Stone Creamery Ice Cream. It's not in the store yet. It wasn't there yesterday - they told me it would be in today - and it isn't there. This is unfair. I want the right to go in there and see the ice cream and then not buy any. It would preserve my record for the week. I went to the mall yesterday. I seldom do that but I wanted to find slippers for The Bear, of course I was not successful. People may be getting larger, but it appears footwear isn't. Where are the size 12-13's? Nowhere. About 120 percent of the time, mall stores don't have what I want.

In between these events, and when I'm not dreaming about plumbing taking revenge, my bedtime reading is Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel, the historical novel that won the Man Booker prize in 2009. It's a wonderful fat book -with no calories attached.

And, somewhere in the back of my mind, my little Nash Rambler fiction car is very quietly going - Beep beep. Beep beep. Now if real life would kindly stop making a ruckus, and blocking the road..... the Muse might arrive.

What Would Gigi Do?

2010-05-06T17:54:00.005-04:00

Gigi was our family nickname for my mother when my grandsons were younger. It's short for great-grandma. She died when the boys were still quite young, but her influence is still with us.

Sunday is Mothers Day so she is in my thoughts a bit more than usual, but not in an overly sentimental way. She was pragmatic about most things and extremely practical, both by nature and because she had to be.

When I have to make a decision about whether to do the boring practical thing, or the want-to-have-fun thing, her voice pops into my head. Sometimes I wish it wouldn't because her advice is usually - do what you should do, and not what you wish you could do. That's why I have a new heating and air conditioning system and why I won't be visiting Montreal this year. But, that's okay because my apartment will be cool on even the hottest days and the system will pay for itself, over the next umpty-umpteen years.

Thanks for the advice, mom.

I'm buying myself a lottery ticket for Mothers' Day. What are you planning?

Hi Ho! Hi Ho! -

2010-04-28T10:13:00.005-04:00

It's off to work we go. My pen has been hired again for a quick turn-around assignment and as usual I hope to spend part of my weekend with The Viking, so I'm posting now instead of on Friday. My son-in-law has also been hired. He has a contract position that will require a lot of travel and he leaves for the U.S. today. I'm happy for him. I'm also glad that I have a paying gig. A little extra cash is always good especially when I'll be spending a big chunk from a small pile. (see next para).

I need to finish my assignment early because on Tuesday a new furnace and air conditioning unit will be installed at my place. It's likely I'll have no electricity, which means no heat and no computer access, and no water for most of the day. Then it will definitely be time for the oft-postponed major spring cleaning that will include sorting through my paper piles. A task that will likely take longer than any of the other cleaning chores.

In other news, Peter Milliken, (Speaker of the House of Commons) has ruled that the will of parliament trumps the Prime Minister's desire to prevent documents re the treatment of Afghan detainees from being examined. The Speaker's decision is correct but what action will be taken? I guess we will find out in two weeks, or perhaps sooner if an agreement can be reached. I hae me doots - but should the true spirit of parliamentary cooperation arise, I'll be happily surprised.

I wish you all a productive week.

Eternity Soup

2010-04-23T19:23:00.009-04:00

That's the intriguing title of a book by Greg Critser. The full title is Eternity Soup, Inside the Quest to End Aging, published by Harmony Books,New York, 2010. Critser is also the author of Fat Land: How Americans Became the Fattest People in the World and, Generation RX: How Prescription Drugs are Altering American Lives, Minds and Bodies.

First of all, I have to tell you, in case you're not 200 percent sure, that there is no way to escape The End. Everybody dies. It's a natural event. However, there is a huge anti-aging industry, particularly in the U.S., that wants to deny, or at least delay, the inevitable and Critser presents information about the latest theories and treatments.

Because I studied gerontology, because I spent a lot of my career working with seniors, and because my joints refuse to obey me in the morning; I wanted to know if there was anything new and beneficial out there.

Possibly there is, but there are also a lot of weird and not-so-attractive ideas. For example, there's a group called the Caloric Restriction society. They believe in eating as little as possible to sustain life and they talk a lot about beneficial changes to their biochemistry. They also say that the always-hungry feeling goes away after a while and they live longer. I don't know but I tend to agree with the author who says:
"Do you want your extended life to be a life, or not? There had to be a better way than the cold way. The hungry way. The flat-ass, no-sex way."

So, what about hormone supplements like testosterone, estrogen, and even human growth hormones and other types of supplements? The uses of testosterone and estrogen are well known, but human growth hormones? Some research shows that HGH may improve bone and tissue mass and slow some affects of aging, but other research doesn't support it. There is a big new medical supplement industry and American doctors mostly get paid in cash to compound these supplements because they aren't often funded by HMO's. Lots of doctors attend seminars to find out how to jump on this cash cow/er bandwagon.

Did you know there is an American Association of Anti-Aging Medicine? Many of the members are corporations with products to sell of course. Including Earthing Solutions, a company that sells "Barefoot Connections" a device which "helps the earth's electric field transfer easily to the body", and another company that sells colon hydrotherapy stations. Egad! Then there are the doctor purveyors of hormones , lots and lots of hormones.

Can we replace and rejuvenate worn out parts of ourselves? We already can do some things. Maybe someday we can make new kidneys using cells from our own body. That would be tissue engineering. Critser provides a lot of detailed information on what researchers are doing in this area. Stem cells, which can become any kind of tissue are key, because the number of stem cells decreases with age. What if we could age more slowly at the cellular level. Could that extend our healthy time and our life span?

Some scientists note that "when single genes are changed, animals that should be old stay young. In humans, these mutants would be analogous to a ninety-year-old who looks and feels forty-five. On this basis we begin to think of aging as a disease that can be cured, or at least postponed." Aubrey de Grey, a Cambridge cell biologist got a lot of press for his view that aging is a disease that - "kills fucking 1000,000 people world wide and I want to stop it." Frankly, I think that's nonsense.

The book gets technically more and more complicated as it examines engineering approaches to fixing aging and playing with regenerating neural connections and using liquid peptides for repairs.

Perhaps the life-span of people in the most developed and richest countries of the world will increase, but one of the most important issues of aging that is scarcely mentioned in the book, until the end, is loss.

Maybe it's my non-scientific, interest in all the extremely important psycho-social issues that leads me to believe an essential part of what makes us live longer and happier lives has been left out of the book until close to the end. We have a primal need to be connected to other people.

In conclusion, I have no desire to live forever, but if some of my words survive me, I will be content.

Don't Think About Ice Cream

2010-04-16T10:32:00.014-04:00

We have had beautiful spring weather here in the Kitchener area. It was so warm that the magnolia trees opened. They are showing off their pink and white blossoms, and blushing like the virginal maids of yore. It was 26 degrees Fahrenheit yesterday afternoon. Male teenagers on skateboards cruised down the main drag and so did old guys in BMW convertibles. Very young women in pedal pushers (oops! cropped pants) and navel-baring tops sauntered along and pretended not to notice their admirers.

I was accosted by an ice cream parlour. Usually, I walk on the other side of the street, but due to road construction I was trapped on the sidewalk in front of the store. The sign winked at me salaciously and I was tempted. I tried to resist, but I my feet had a will of their own. They wanted me to sit down. Did I tell you that the store sells all-natural hand-made ice cream? And, did I tell you that my daughter works for local veterinary firm? What could I do? I had to support the dairy farmers. I ordered a scoop of vanilla ice cream with chocolate chips and cherries in it. I savoured every spoonful and scraped the dish. I would have licked it too, but I was sitting in the front of the store and there were other people around.

Maybe there's a lesson for me. If I do my best not to think about writing, I may end up writing something new.

What's on your - don't think about it - list?

Face it - How Tolerant Are We?

2010-04-08T18:02:00.027-04:00

I'm prompted to ask myself how tolerant I am, how tolerant the average Canadian is , and when and if we should not tolerate differences. Over the last few days I've thought about this a lot. Why? Because the province of Quebec is introducing Bill 94. This legislation will require that people uncover their faces for purposes of "security, communication and identification," when they want to receive government services (schools and universities included). The bill does not mention the niqab or the burka; however, Muslims who wear them are the group who would be affected and, I suppose, anyone wearing a balaclava. From what I have read, there are not a lot of Muslim women in Quebec who would have to adjust to the proposed changes. I don't think the number matters, although it has been argued that since the legislation would impact only a few women, they should be accommodated instead of changing the law.

I understand the reason for wearing a head scarf/hijab and the reason some Orthodox Jewish women wear wigs. And, I can understand being made to wear a head covering when singing in a Catholic church as a sign of respect for another religion (yes, it was a long time ago). But concealing one's face with a niqab is not a religious requirement, nor is wearing a burka.

The burka with an eye screen completely effaces a person and frankly, I find that spooky. I don't know who is in there. And, I don't understand why any woman would voluntarily make such a choice. Modesty is one thing - complete abdication of individuality is another. The nijab is only marginally less self-negating. Also, maybe because I lived in a big city for so long, I am more conscious of security matters. A garment that conceals everything is the perfect place to hide things and, it should be noted, the perfect way to blame Muslims for an attack. I'm sure there are many ways to obtain a burka. Paranoia, too much imagination? - perhaps.

It's interesting that The Canadian Muslim Congress supports the proposed legislation. The Quebec government argues that the law would not contravene the Canadian Charter of Rights, but some lawyers say that it will.

It seems to me that makes sense to know who the government is giving services to and most of us rely on our vision to help us make decisions. Does this mean there are limits to multicultural tolerance? It may. I wonder if David Lepofsky, a well-known lawyer who often comments on rights issues and who happens to be blind, will comment on this issue.

What do you think?

Wondrously Made

2010-04-02T16:27:00.006-04:00

This afternoon, The Viking and I went to see Bodies, The Exhibition, which is currently on at The Museum (formerly The Children's Museum) in downtown Kitchener. We were amazed. If the exhibition ever travels to your city, then make sure to see it. I know a reasonable amount about what is inside of us, but when I saw the bodies and parts of bodies, I was almost dumbstruck by their beauty. So many many intricate parts and somehow, when they are all working, we never think about them.

And when things go wrong, as they did for my brother, what we have learned about the body helps us to repair it. The fix can be complicated and isn't always permanent, but there are so many more options now. My brother, who had massive surgery and other fixes applied to him, is fairly stable at the moment and has even gained a bit of weight. Of course his strong will, and his steadfast faith also help him and healing thoughts and prayers from his family and friends play their part too.

We are indeed wondrously made.

March Magazine Mania

2010-03-27T15:02:00.007-04:00

Once in a while, perhaps every four months or so, I have an urge to see what's current on the magazine racks in my local independent bookstore. In March, I bought three magazines. I could have read them in the library, but that would have meant waiting until they weren't in demand. This month I bought the Atlantic Magazine, Harper's Magazine and the New Yorker. I didn't buy a Canadian magazine. Maybe I should get a slap on the wrist or something. I do read Macleans magazine every day (Canadian mag.) in the online version, and used to read The Walrus (pretentious Canadian mag.) when I had a gift subscription. So, why choose those three magazines?

My New Yorker habit, which I had to taper down because it's a weekly magazine, started years ago. A friend who had a subscription used to give me her copies after she read them. I was hooked. I couldn't buy a copy every week, but I did buy one or two every month when I was working full time. The New Yorker has changed over the years, but I still like it - a lot. In the March 1st issue there's an article titled The Deflationist which is about the economist, Paul Krugman. His views on the stock market and the economy are the opposite of boring. In the same issue, there's an article about mountain people who live in isolation only 25 miles from New York city. The magazine also publishes wonderful fiction. And, there are cartoons - there are always cartoons in the New Yorker. Sometimes I don't understand one, but then again, I don't live in New York and I'm not young or hip.

I've been a fan of Harper's since I first browsed through one in a bookstore eons ago. Harper's Index, which appears at the front of every issue always has interesting/startling and sometimes downright weird facts to impart. From this month's issue: "Percentage of American men aged 18 to 29 who believe that standing up during sex is an effective form of contraception , 18. Percentage of U.S. public grade-school teachers who say they buy food for hungry students every month, 63." Also in the March issue, an article on "The Guantanamo 'Suicides'" and Mammon from Heaven, which is about the prosperity gospel in recession. Harper's also features readings - very short things first published in other places. For instance, I, Sexbot, which first appeared on the website of TrueCompanion.com. I'm sure you want to know that the robot, which will "deliver the ultimate in robot sex" is called Roxxxy.

The Atlantic Magazine, which is one of the oldest magazines still living, is also a favourite of mine. Where else could you find an article on How a New Jobless Era Will Transform America (yes, it's depressing) along with an article on Management Secrets of the Grateful Dead and some thoughts on preserving old video games for the cultural record.

Do you subscribe to any magazines, and if you do why did you choose them?

A Ride with "Johnny Cash" Leads to Food in Fiction

2010-03-19T18:57:00.007-04:00

The weather here has been amazingly good and many more people than usual are out and about. I wonder what some of them do in the winter time and whether their foibles cause problems in close quarters. For example, there was a man on the bus with me today who loves Johnny Cash. I'm rather partial to Cash too. I think his music is three-hundred percent more real than almost any 'country' singer I can think of. Although I must admit, I don't think of country singers very often.

In any event, this Johnny Cash fan had a fixation for Ring of Fire. At first, I thought he was listening to it on an ipod or CD player and didn't realize he was singing along but that wasn't the case . His brain was stuck on four lines of the song and he sang them over and over and over. He wasn't loud and he was almost in tune, but now the song is in my brain. It's a good thing the bus rider wasn't singing "We got married in a fever hotter than a pepper pot." I don't think I could have tolerated many repetitions of that line. It makes me think about food

I started contemplating the sensual value of food in fiction again this week. Why? Because my daughter raved about a book so I found it at the library and have read it. The Food of Love, by A. Capella (Isn't that a lovely name for a writer?) has so many sensual descriptions of Italian food that it's overwhelming in places. It's a comedy of errors novel and while I may not remember it forever, I did enjoy it. Also it made me consider how often I use food as a descriptive vehicle in my work. In one of my stories chocolate played a key role but generally, I don't refer to food that often. Maybe I'll use it more often in the future, or maybe I'm revved up after reading about all the fine food, which often led to other delightfully sensual things.

So, here is this week's question. Does the description of meals, or the preparation of them appear in your fiction with any frequency?

No Dragon Slayer in the House

2010-03-04T21:21:00.008-05:00

The federal government's budget was read to the House of Commons today and will be debated tomorrow, and perhaps on other days during this session of parliament. The enormous, vicious fire-breathing deficit dragon was not attacked with any efficient weapons. Instead, the finance minister waved a white flag at it from a distance and assured us that it would shrink to the size of a grasshopper in three or four or five years, or thereabouts. He believes this will happen because: - the economy will keep on improving (I liken this to a faith in financial miracle healing) and because - there won't be any "new" stimulus spending (so the economy will have a good time stimulating itself when the current stimulus money runs out, I assume) - and - some government salaries will be frozen and no new staff will be added. Also, taxes will not be increased and some will be decreased.

I am in favour of controlling the number of people who work in government and ensuring that tax money is used wisely ( the government should listen to Kevin Page). Bureaucracies have a natural tendency to grow into huge fiefdoms given the slightest opportunity. However, I suspect that the areas most affected will be the ones that mean the least to the supporters of socially regressive Conservative party. I believe funding for the arts will decrease more than funding for other sectors since creative people are considered effete and useless. The contribution the artistic community makes to the economy will be downplayed again. Little money will be given to environmental issues because the Conservatives are sure that only wing-nut lefties care about those things and the government wants to encourage more foreign investment and more free trade. (Free trade is not 'free' but that's a subject for another post.)

Unfortunately, the Goods and Services Tax will not be increased although that would be the fairest way to begin to tackle the dragon. And yes, I think we should increase the GST. Even one percentage point would do more to decrease the deficit than anything else that has been proposed and it wouldn't be all that painful.

The government says we are - open for business. Oh goody! I guess we were closed before due to our propensity to tax corporations at a rate that some people think is unacceptable. I would argue that we can never decrease taxes to the levels that some countries offer because a) we are a huge country, b) we have a small population, and c) we need to fund the programs that make us unique. We cannot do this unless we tax adequately. So what does attract business to Canada? Our health and social support programs are a big draw. Do we really need more huge corporations that make demands on local provincial and federal governments in return for possible future success (think of the auto industry bail outs)? Or, are more small and mid-sized businesses a better bet in the long haul? In spite of the recession, new small businesses start-up every day. I'd rather offer a modicum of support to them than to larger enterprises.

All is not lost though, for we will save 1.8 billion each year by decreasing foreign aid. But hey! - it's only those people, so never mind about them and remember - no visible new taxes. So, get out there and buy something.

Luddites, Unite!

2010-02-25T10:00:00.012-05:00

Some say, we must move with the times, but I say, let's do so very slowly and beware of the dominance of machines. I'm a big fan of slowness and my computer obliges me. I've been told it's obsolete although it is only six years old. That makes me wonder if I'm past my 'best-by' date because I'm 66. Just yesterday, my computer's diagnostic program told me that my pc doesn't have enough RAM. Now, I resent that because another part of my computer informed me that 81% of the hard drive is free space. What good is all that space if it isn't useful for RAM? I have no idea. I know that my own random access memory occasionally fails to respond to my commands and has to be prompted, but I don't know how I can acquire more RAM and I don't know how much free space for memories is left in my wee brain. I prefer to assume there is plenty.

Not only does my computer lack enough RAM but also it could not change an MSWord file into a pdf file. I searched for the answer but failed to find it. As it turns out, that's because my 'old' Office 2000 MSWord didn't offer that option. I didn't know what a pdf file was because I operate my computer on a need-to-know basis and before this week I didn't need that information. I believe there are tiny people inside the computer and one shouldn't piss them off by asking for too much. In any event, thanks to The Viking who is not a Luddite, I have a new Microsoft Office program and it converts Word files to pdf files. As of this morning, the little green people have been content to obey my commands. Now, if only I could find all the widgets that change margins and fonts and other things in my new Office program, I'd be content too. I am slowly figuring it out.

Because I'm a Luddite, I prefer to form long-term relationships with my machines and appliances, but they are often fickle and even treacherous at times. My stereo receiver which is about 25 years old (I know, yikes!) will operate the turntable and the CD player that was attached to it a couple of years ago, but it refuses to tune in FM stations anymore. Maybe it was tired of carrying only CBC radio 2. It's very old so it's entitled to be grouchy.

On the other hand, my hot water heater was only about seven years old but it peformed poorly so I sent it out of the game and bought a new one. I didn't want to retire it so early, however; the plumber who replaced it said electric hot water heaters last only about 5 to 7 years (yikes again!). He informed me of that after he gave me the $790 invoice. In this age of sophisticated machines, I wonder why no one can make one that will last as long as my stereo?

My television is only about two years old, but it isn't high-definition so it is old technology and if the local TV station disappears I'll be boob tube-less because I receive the TV signal via my aerial (ancient technology). Yes, I could hook up my computer to our local cable provider but that would be too expensive. I can survive without television as there is seldom much worth watching although I am enjoying some of the Olympics coverage.

I'd prefer not to think about the age of my central air conditioning unit which is located five floors above me, on the roof. Apparently it uses freon, so if it fails to work it can't be repaired. Freon is a banned substance now. I can only hope that fans, which are simple basic machines, will still be available if I need to buy some. Maybe I'll buy black-out blinds, but then again, I'm told the roller thingies wear out in about four years. It's enough to make a Luddite like me sew curtains by hand because I've never had any luck with sewing machines either.

Also, earlier this week our family lost our favourite car. The Crown Victoria which had carried the family to and from many places and events and served well and honourably for many years was totalled. We are all saddened by the loss of the beloved Crown Vic. I'm sure neither of the other cars will last as long or be as comfortable for long trips. They are newer cars, but they just ain't the same.

Luddites like things to stay the same, or at least same-ish and we like things that work well for long periods of time but perhaps we are obsolete too?

Someday, It Will be Spring

2010-02-18T15:40:00.004-05:00

According to the calendar the official arrival of spring is a little over a month away. Of course, when the day arrives we could have snow, or ice, or almost any darn thing imaginable in the way of weather. The southern parts of Canada are not immune to the reappearance of winter until perhaps sometime in late May, if then.

I get antsy waiting for spring to get here and want to run off to ... somewhere - to Montreal (winter is an acceptable season if I'm in Montreal) or to Mexico, if Mexico wasn't dangerous, or Costa Rica. Unless something spectacular happens, I'll be staying put. I do enjoy dreaming about travelling though.

If you could go away for one week, where would you go?

Chutzpah - Do You Have It?

2010-02-05T20:30:00.002-05:00

My Canadian Oxford Dictionary says chutzpah is a Yiddish word that means 1: shameless audacity; cheek and 2. boldness. I wonder if writers need of it more than other people do. There are so many times when I could benefit from being audacious. Is the work ready to send out? If I have honed it past a fare-thee-well, then likely it is. But, I still hesitate. There are no places to take chutzpah lessons because, while there are assertiveness classes chutzpah is more than being assertive. There's no exact English equivalent for the word but I think chutzpah is more illogical than mere assertiveness. It's being bold in spite of the odds. Consider the number of rock singers with much more urge to flaunt themselves than talent or the men wno run Ponzi schemes.

I've been thinking about this more of late, thanks to a book I picked up: How to Become a Famous Writer before You're Dead (Your words in print and your name in lights) by Ariel Gore. She has more chutzpah than any writer I know, and maybe she has more of it than of good sense. But then, when did good sense ever lead to well, seeing your name in lights - or even in a respected literary journal. Gore has a lot of fun and presents a lot of off-the-wall ideas.

In any event, among her many suggestions for becoming a brazen self-promoter, there is one I'm considering. Start a zine she says. Now, I don't know how to do that, and I'm not very web savvy and there are likely many good reasons why I shouldn't even think about it. On the other hand - I know some writers, I know how to edit and I know it could be an adventure.

Do you have chutzpah?

Seven Things You Didn't Know About Me

2010-01-29T14:58:00.008-05:00

Fellow writer and blogger, Angela Addams (The Temptress, Cobblestone Press, 2009) nominated me to write on this topic.

I had to think a while since I don't want to reveal anything that would lead you to believe I'm extremely weird. I will admit that I'm odd, but most likely you are too.

The list:

1) I attended a one-room red insul-brick school for my first two years of' 'edumacation' and even when I sat in the front row, I couldn't see a darn thing. In spite of that, I learned to read and kept on reading - see point 2

2) My childhood bedroom was in the basement of my grandparents' house. The cement floor was very cold in the winter and very wet when it flooded every spring. I had an antique console radio in my room. It was large and had tubes inside that glowed in the dark. I was seldom allowed to listen to it late at night so a flashlight and a book became my companions. I don't need to use a flashlight anymore, but I still read in bed.

3) I've had very long hair and very short hair (my current style is pixie-like), curly hair and straight hair, but I've never dyed, tinted or streaked my hair. I am not opposed to doing any of those things. Someday, I might colour my hair. In the meantime I enjoy seeing the colours and styles other members of my family choose to adorn their heads.

4) When I lived in Toronto, I rented out the second bedroom in my apartment in order to almost make ends meet. I did this for quite a few years and my roomies came from exotic places like Jamaica, Somalia, Pakistan, Japan, and Hamilton Ontario. I learned a lot about what you need to tell them.. For example, don't poke at the coils inside the freezer compartment of the ancient refrigerator with a knife - the fridge doesn't like that and it will die. Please, oh please, don't mop the hardwood tiles with water. And finally, don't let your boyfriend in if he has a weapon.

5) I have no piercings anywhere on my body. I do have scars - a very long appendix scar since the surgeons were in a great rush to get inside me and a long scar on my knee.

6) I love baby beef liver and hate cooked cauliflower.

7) Most of my furnishings were given to me or inherited. In fact, if I kept only what I've purchased with my own money I'd have: a piano, a very old stereo, three sets of book shelves and a kitchen table and chairs. Thank goodness I frittered away my fortune in other ways.

Deep dark secret disclosures: I like hearing bad puns, eating real ice cream, rereading Little Women, and watching Johnny Depp in any movie, (even the Pirate movies).

In This World

2010-01-23T08:45:00.004-05:00

In this world, a reality starlet had ten well-tended plastic surgeries.

In this world, Haitian children's limbs were cut off with no anesthesia.

In this world, Survivors thrived as a 'reality' television show.

In this world, how many Haitians died no one can know.

Are we one world, as so many now attest?

When the music stops and the stars move on to other causes, other shows

The lost and broken ones move off the screen but they exist

In this world.

A Couple of Books I Recommend

2010-01-16T09:03:00.003-05:00

First, a thank-you to the people who responded to my previous post about editors. I'm only annoyed and disappointed when an editor says something vague like - it's not our style. And yes, I do get over my anger. I'm a Cancer sign so that takes time because Cancer people are stubborn, though I prefer to think of us as tenacious.

I hope my brother is tenacious too, he is back in the hospital and we don't know much yet. Writing is hard to do when one's fingers are permanently crossed. Therefore, I decided to mention a couple of books I recommend.

Delivery by Betty Jane Hegerat (Oolichan Books 2009) is an absorbing and sometimes heart-wrenching novel about a young woman who has to decide whether to give away her baby. The baby's grandmother gets involved and then ... no, I can't reveal what happens. Read it. It's excellent.

During my volunteer shelf-reading stint at the library on Wednesday, I discovered Outwitting Writer's Block and Other Problems of the Pen by Jenna Glatzer. It has already given me quite a few laughs and given my current frame of mind, that's no easy task. The book is light-hearted - a rare thing since it's about a serious, or semi-serious subject. It won't ever be classed as "literature", but it's fun to read. Here's a sample quote:

"You decide Real Writers would never stare at a blank page for three days. .... You are defective ....Don't think I'm going to correct you. ...If I weren't so defective in the first place I'd probably never be a writer ... But the world needs us weirdos. If we didn't write about the glorious lives of bag ladies, mountain climbers, misfits, barflies, and homecoming queens, who would? So, go right ahead and be defective and write anyway."

I haven't finished the book yet, but I found more to giggle about this morning, and more motivation too.

Write.

The Editor as Black Hat and Sometimes, White Hat.

2010-01-04T14:20:00.010-05:00

In very old western movies, the bad guys were easy to identify and were known as black hats. Sometimes, editors must be bad guys. I wore my black hat on Boxing Day weekend when I took on the role of gunslinger/editor and shot down long confusing sentences. They were not my sentences but it was not an easy task. I feared I would be ambushed by the obscure jargon which lurked amidst the already complex language thickets of a long report. I was also afraid that my client wouldn't accept all of the many changes I had made. Fortunately she accepted almost all of them and I became the good guy, white hat, this time.

It is far easier to edit other people's writing, especially non-fiction writing than it is to edit my own fiction. Some of the fiction rejections I received recently have offered comments. My first reaction to any negative comment received in a rejection letter is always anger. Yes, I know, that's not the way to respond. I'm working on it, and I'll continue to work on my stories too.

It's a new year and there is hope.

Season of Hope

2009-12-21T16:46:00.003-05:00

It is the winter solstice, the longest night of the year. At the moment, the light in my living room comes from my small Christmas tree-of-hope in one corner by the window and the sweet grass candle on my dining room table. I light this candle when I want to concentrate on sending good thoughts into the universe and as the sky grows ever darker and night draws in to surround me; I remember that tomorrow the day will be longer and I hope for many things.

I hope that my family members will find work to sustain them. I hope that two of my long-time friends will also find work to sustain them. I hope that a very dear friend's mother will be given more grace and favour time to be with those she loves. I hope that my brother's health continues to improve.

Yes, I hope for the greater good too. World peace, an end to hunger, and the realization that this small blue globe is fragile and needs our immediate care.

I will be hoping and praying for these things this evening.

As my pagan friend says "Blessed be."

May all your hope trees bear sweet fruit.

Season of Darkness. Season of Lights

2009-12-11T15:00:00.003-05:00

As I type this, the snow is falling thick and fast. The roads are slippery and some sidewalks are invisible. There was a vicious wind this morning when I went out to gather just a few things and lugged two heavy bags full of treats back to my cave - and it isn't even winter yet. I know why our ancestors almost hibernated at this time of year, and why they put weight on in the fall. I think it's ingrained, that instinct to eat and eat because who knows when the next mastodon will pass by. So, I will enjoy my treats, in moderation, and postpone regrets until the weather improves, or until I forget to regret, whichever comes first. After all, it's gloomy out there. It gets dark enough now to need lights on in my apartment by four-thirty in the afternoon and sometimes even earlier.

For me, lights are an essential part of the celebration and the anticipation of return of the sun after the shortest day of the year ends. I do my best to conserve energy, but I must have Christmas tree lights, and lights on in my living space when the skies are grey and the weatherman predicts still more greyness in the days ahead. By 5:30, my lights will be on and they will stay on until it's time for me to go to sleep. There are incandescent lights on the Christmas tree, in my reading lamp and in the ceiling fixture over the dining room table. The rest of the lights are those wriggly energy-saving bulb thingies, and daylight fluorescent tubes in the kitchen. They do not please me.. Incandescent lights give a warmth that other types of lighting don't provide.

Besides, incandescent is an inspiring word, "intense in feeling, expression, ardent," according to the Oxford Canadian Dictionary. I need all the inspiration I can get.

Enjoy the season of lights.

Tiny Reasons for Happiness

2009-12-04T19:38:00.003-05:00

Christmas is approaching rapidly. Somehow, as soon as December arrives the days are too short for all the things I think I should do. So I pick some 'want to do" things and let the rest go. I want to say a bit about happiness which is often a fleeting thing but always welcome when it pays a visit. Sometimes the reasons for my happiness are tiny.

For instance, the appearance of a charming and peaceful eight-week-old baby at our condominium Christmas party and my ability to use the tiny (and tinny) keyboard to play Christmas music at the party. I also used a tiny bit of self-deprecating humour to get people to relax and sing along with me.

Then, there's the word itself. "Tiny"" is short and not appealing to the ear, except when used by The Viking in this phrase. "She's a tiny woman, like you." I am not a 98 pound weakling or wonder. I'm a middle of the road woman, with a middle. But, I'd never disagree him. It's too delightful to hear him say those words and they always make me smile.

How can I apply the theme of this post to my writing life. Well, there has been a tiny bit of progress in the last three months. I wrote a short story ( It needs revisions and I will get to them.) I edited a couple of articles for my daughter and also had one paid assignment. Tiny things all, but still, they are good things.

I wish you good things, both tiny and large, for the holidays.

Harper - No Life Jacket, Lots of Lies

2009-12-01T10:14:00.003-05:00

It's a weird ol' world, ain't it? The Prime Minister accuses his parliamentary opponents of slagging the Canadian Armed Forces. They didn't. Before that, he accused a Canadian senior bureaucrat of being both incompetent and a liar. From all reputable reports, the bureaucrat is competent and was forwarding information he had received.

Today, there is a picture of Harper at sea, in a small boat. He is not wearing a life jacket. I can only wonder what lie he will tell about this mistake, and who he will blame. At the moment, I wish he was far out at sea in a small boat, without a life jacket, and alone. I will try to get over feeling this way about our supposed leader, whose actions indicate that he knows only how to attack and doesn't know how to lead by example or by working with others, but it won't be an easy task for me. Maybe the Christmas spirit will find me, and find Mr. Harper too. I sure hope so.

Aim High. Fall on Butt. Get Up. Try Elsewhere

2009-11-14T11:03:00.003-05:00

I followed Margaret Springer's advice. "I will do my best work and send it to the top appropriate markets, working down from there as ncessary. (Otherwise I'll never know how good I am)."

So, in the last three weeks, I've had three rejections from major literary short story markets (in Canada). It ain't no fun, but I've accepted them and my next goal is to get the stories out again.

Not this weekend though, since the weather is perfect and The Viking and I will spend time together. I'll start on Monday - that seems appropriate.

My Wild, Weird and Wet Week

2009-11-09T15:01:00.003-05:00

I've had more than a week's worth of wildness, weirdness and water. It's been like a roller coaster ride, and while I enjoy roller coasters, I appreciate them more from a distance. So, here's what has happened since my last post.

First, I heard the great news about my brother's health. The major surgery and all the treatments he endured have put him among the 5% of people who beat the odds. It was a terrific birthday present for him and for all of us. And after that there was more good news. The Viking has to have a nasty test periodically and his results were fine. Hooray for our side and all that.

I almost didn't get depressed when I received another rejection note, because - I had aimed high - and I received interesting advice. However, I was fretting and holding my breath for another reason. My daughter and son-in-law were in negotiations to sell their business. it got complicated, way too complicated, and communications were a big problem. I continued to fret about their situation until 4:45 Thursday morning when there was a loud knocking at my door.

If that had happened when I lived in my old apartment in Toronto, I would have known it was a drunk person and would have ignored it. However, if there are drunks in this building, they don't roam the halls, so I went to the door. The man who lives below me wanted to know if I had water in my laundry room. Oh boy! did I, and it was seeping toward the living room. We looked at the ceiling in the laundry room and discovered water was dripping down through the air conditioning duct system, or from somewhere else above me. I grabbed my mop and pail and got to work. I thought I was making headway and then the drip got faster and faster. So I had to mop faster and faster and faster. It was still coming down and I wondered what on earth had happened above me. After a time, my neighbour returned and told me a hot water heater two floors above me had burst and they were waiting for the plumber. I mopped some more, then the head came off the mop (probably in protest at the abuse it was taking), I popped it back in and continued. My arms and my back and arms were aching by then, but I didn't dare stop. Finally at about 6:30 the wet invasion ended and I made progress. By 7 a.m. no more water was arriving and I had mopped up everywhere. But, water had seeped under a corner of the living room carpet.

For two long days and two long nights, I had an industrial dehumidifier and fan running constantly. Everything is dry now, but I have something else to worry about. What about my hot water heater?

There was good news at the end of the week though. My daughter and son-in-law have sold their business. What's next. They don't know yet and neither do I, but I'm sure it will be good.

I hope for a calm week ahead with no more flooding and lots of writing time.

Mail Oddities

2009-10-22T14:22:00.005-04:00

No, it doesn't say male oddities. That's another subject and I have only limited experience with certain kinds of male oddities. Never you mind.

So, about mail, real mail that is. The kind that comes in an envelope and is delivered by a mail carrier. I have received a weird selection of things over the last few days.

First, I got a letter from one of the banks about a RIF cheque that had been issued to my friend, The Bear, in 2000 and never cashed. I found a lot of uncashed cheques in The Bear's apartment when I took over his affairs, but I didn't find that one. I am amazed that the bank has offered to reissue it. However, I filled in the required paperwork and sent it in. If I receive a replacement cheque, I'll be re-amazed.

Then, I found one of my self-addressed stamped envelopes returned by certain Canadian literary journal. I knew right away it contained a rejection because I could see the tiny little slip of paper inside. So, I have another "no" slip to add to my growing pile but the thing is, I can't discover what I sent to them. Normally I write down my submissions in three places, sigh. I know I'll figure it out, it's probably a late, late, late, reply, but I can't figure out why that little envelope took over two weeks to arrive according to the post mark. Maybe it came by lame pony express, or maybe the mail sorters (out of luck writers?) knew what was in it and decided to delay the bad news.

I never expect mail to be swift but once in a great while, I'm surprised. I was surprised today, because I ordered four books from Chapters/Indigo on Monday - ship by regular mail - and they were outside my apartment door today (Thursday). The books wouldn't fit in my mailbox and I wasn't home, so the mail carrier, who is male, brought them upstairs. I don't know if it's legal to do that but he did. Now I have four Christmas presents on hand, but they're not for the males in my life.

Also, today I also received another book in the mail from a friend. "The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society" is a wonderful title and I'm looking forward to reading the book.

The last item in the mail was a cheque for a little bit of technical writing I completed last week. Things go in streaks, so probably next week there will be nothing in my mail box except bills.

Have you received any good or weird mail?

A BILLION Hungry People - No Media Frenzy

2009-10-15T17:03:00.005-04:00

In this morning's newspaper, the UN food agency reports that the number of hungry people has increased to 1.2 BILLION and will continue to rise if the right kind of help is not given. The short article about this appears on the World News page (page 7) rather than on the front page where I think it belongs. There is no editorial addressing this either. The paper does have a local focus, but this issue is so huge, and growing, that I think it should have had a lot more attention.

Has hunger in other parts of the world become just a background noise that we can ignore? After all we have heard the refrain so often. "People are starving in ________.
" Well," some folk say, "we send food, and then more food. and things never improve , why don't they help themselves?" I understand why they say that but, that response ignores a lot of factors like wars, displacement, prolonged drought and the fact that agricultural aid to increase food production has dropped.

When I donate money towards world hunger, as I did today, after reading the newest numbers, I choose agencies that work toward long term results, like The Mennonite Central Committee's Food for All program. My point is a lot more people might do that if they knew the benefits.

Shouldn't we take care of our own first? That's something I've heard people say too. So, what about local hunger? Food banks in our area report that demand has increased because of higher unemployment and other factors. The Thanksgiving food drive hasn't reached it's goal yet. My daughter and son-in-law's business participated this year, as they did last year. The amount of food they collected from their customers was slightly lower this year (847 pounds), but since they have fewer customers due to the economic downturn, I'd say they had a good result, although they had hoped for more donations. A local church offered a free Thanksgiving meal and had record numbers of diners. I am not surprised, since people on assistance (government income support programs like workfare and ODSP) often have a very hard time paying for both rent and food. These are the very same people that are accused of spending all their money on drink and cigs. I can tell you from experience - most recipients of government assistance don't do that. Yet, the myth endures.

Meanwhile, the media give us more and more infotainment (sorry, I hate the word, but that's what they call it) and less and less hard news.

Maybe it's our fault. We don't want to hear about it and it doesn't sell papers, or make people click on Internet ads. Are the people that run the publishing conglomerates right and what we want is more fake news - the latest about the celebrities of the moment? Or, could the real news actually sell?

Techno-Wonders?

2009-10-09T16:16:00.004-04:00

I don't own more than an average amount of technology and some of what I have is obsolete. My stereo receiver and turntable were purchased in about 1986. They still work, but I can't tune in CBC Radio One on the FM band, though CBC Radio Two reception is fine. When my AM-FM clock radio stopped working, I found a new one at crappy Tire. The price? A whopping $9.00, tax included. The radio is in the bedroom, close to the window and it picks up the CBC Radio One signal clearly. The radio was made in China, as was my previous one which was only two years old when it died. It's impossible to buy small electronic items that are made in Canada. Everything is made off-continent. I wonder how long my new radio will last, and I wonder about a couple of other things, too.

If e-books are the way of the future, and many people believe they are, then how often would one have to buy a new device to read the books, and if the device dies, don't the stored books die with it?

I don't want to read a book using an electronic device - give me the real book My favourite way to read the printed word is on paper. In fact, I just subscribed to the local newspaper because I don't want to read it online. Also, if the local television station folds and it might as cable wars continue. I want a reasonably current source of local information.

How much am I contributing to environmental degradation? Paper can be recycled. Little is said about the cost of disposing of dead electronic stuff. Then there's the Internet - you seldom see much info about the enormous amounts of energy that are required to run it and other electronic devices - Crackberries and the like.

I'm glad I have access to the Internet, however, if I had to, I could live without it. But I absolutely must have my books.

Profit and Cheeeezies

2009-10-03T11:29:00.012-04:00

My daughter and I had a chat a couple of days ago and one of the things she said made me think about how I interact with money. She said left-wing people ( she knows I lean to the left) often see 'profit' as a bad thing. I can't speak for others on the left, but I know businesses need to make money and since my daughter and her husband run a business, I certainly hope that it will be successful enough to make a profit.

But ......

I think small businesses, such as the one my son-in-law and daughter run are often far more ethical then public corporations. First of all, treating your employees well by paying a reasonable wage and offering what benefits you can afford is the right thing to do. It also makes good business sense to participate in your community and be a good business citizen. "Doing it right' will not necessarily generate a quick profit, or any profit at all, in the beginning - aye, there's the rub. But, I believe that over the long haul a good business reputation is worth a lot.

"Soulless corporations" used to be a left-wing expression. I haven't heard it much lately though it still has value. Why? A publicly owned corporation has only one purpose and that is to make money for its shareholders. People who own shares had grown accustomed to getting larger and larger dividends, no matter what, so solid long-term investments that would provide a lower rate-of-return were scorned. Big fish swallowed little fish and were in turn swallowed by even bigger (and sometimes mythical ) fish, On and on it went, Then the market crashed and there was a lot of talk about regulations, but little if anything has been done to change things.

Greed, not profit, is the dirty word here.

How does all this apply to writing?Well, think of a best selling writer whose book is like a bag of Cheezies. You pay more for it than it's worth, perhaps because so many others are reading it and you want to be au courant. After you finish it, you're left with orange fingers, and maybe a stomach ache, but little or no substance. Then, the writer produces another Cheezie, because, after all, the first one did so well, he has already has the template and why not take the easy way out and reuse it. The product reaches the shelves quickly but maybe a third one doesn't sell as well as the first two.

However; there are the authors who write books that stay in your mind for years. Often, they don't sell that many books, but their readers are not disappointed, they are sustained, maybe even changed by what they have read.

I'd rather write something lasting than write a Cheezie and if my work should happen to make a profit, I'll happily accept my share.

Word On The Street - in the library and in the park

2009-09-28T06:18:00.006-04:00

On Saturday morning, Margaret Atwood read at the downtown library. The auditorium was full. Nancy and I watched her on live video in another room. M.A. was witty and enjoyable. I'm not sure if a certain local television personality, who asked her a couple of questions afterward, would agree, but since his tone of voice was somewhat patronizing (we older women are sensitive to those things) he shouldn't have been surprised when she zapped him for being inaccurate. Many of her anecdotes are obviously well-honed but they work well. She also talked about the emergence of CanLit and how little of it there was before 1960.

An acquaintance told me that M.A. signed books for an hour and a half after the reading and was very gracious to everyone who had waited in line.

If you are interested in what writers wear to these events, here's what M.A. had on - a long tunic top, pants, and flat black oxford-type shoes - not memorable, but very comfortable. Since she is on an exhausting multi-city tour to promote her latest book, I'm sure comfort is important.

Sunday afternoon, we went to the Word on the Street event in Victoria Park. The weather was uncertain, which may have kept some people away. But, there was a good crowd and lots of exhibitors. The New Quarterly had a booth and so did Brucedale Press. I was glad to discover that Brucedale Press is doing well, in spite of the current economic downturn. (They publish work about the Bruce Peninsula area, by writers from 'the Bruce' and environs.) There were two booths with information about Islam, and one booth with information and books on creationism. There was an adult authors' tent, and a children's authors tent where writers gave readings. The writers' collective from the library also had a tent where some members read from their work. The local paper, The Record, had a tent too. Reporters and editors answered questions and talked about journalism. That's where Nancy and I spent most of our time, because she wanted more information about the journalism profession.

I collected a couple of freebies. Zoomer magazine is much better than I expected it would be, now that Moses Znaimer is President and CEO of the Canadian Association of Retired People. The slogan: You've aged differently. Now read differently. I think Moses would also like to change CARP's name, and will stand by for that. I also picked up a copy of Grand magazine, a glossy locally-focused mag which has almost 20,000 circulation. It's purty all right, but I wouldn't subscribe to it.

Before we left the park, I bought a new Word on the Street tee-shirt and tote bag. Both for only $10.00, tax included. I'm happy that I could help support WOTS.

There is also a theatre festival going on in town, from Sept 24 to October 3, Impact 09. I didn't know about it until Friday when I was in City Hall and noticed a sign for the 24 hour play writing competition. Several writers were at work in the rotunda. I applaud them for their ability to work in such a public setting, but have no idea how they manage to do it.

As for my own writing, well, I drafted a new story this month and have also revised and sent out a couple of my older stories. So, I've completed part of the list that stares at me from my bulletin board. It's time to get back to work.

Back-seat Writers

2009-09-17T20:14:00.006-04:00

My daughter and I had a long chat earlier this week. She was in a jokey mood. Imagine if we all lived with you, she said. We could all sit on the chesterfield and watch you write.I laughed but that scared me. Then, I imagined what else she might say and that was worse. It would go something like this:

Before long, we would be asking when we could read the next page. We could offer our opinions. We could chant - is it ready yet? Whenever you gaze into space, or play games, or just generally fart around we could scold you. We would ask you why you have a fetish about putting your submissions in particular mail box and why you check your emails six times a day. We would ask you why you spend so much time on your short stories, when everyone knows almost no one reads short stories anymore, and why you haven't returned to your novel. And - when are you going to write something funny again. We want more silliness.

It was like having a nightmare while awake. Back-seat writers.

As it happens, I have been productive this week, I've drafted a new short story and tuned up an old one and sent it out again. Maybe if I imagine a chorus of back seat writers urging me on, I'll be able to keep up the pace. Then again, maybe not. The muse is fickle and I may have to bribe her. Bribe suggestions are welcome.

Trust Ye Not The Leprechaun

2009-09-10T17:32:00.004-04:00

For verily, I say unto you, ye shall be disappointed. Yon wee leprechaun hath disguised himself as ye federal Minister of Finance and calleth himself Flaherty. He hath not the gold that was taken from us. Let it be known to all those present that he hath spent it all, and mountains more. The weaver of fairy tales, for indeed such they are, had prophesied that all would be well in ye True North, that the vassals would suffer not, nor would they have to pay more evil tax. For taxes be an abomination unto him who sayeth he writeth the budget. Though, truth be told 'tis his master, Harper his ownself, who commandeth him.

Let the edict go forth into all the lands. Let the writ be dropped. Elect him again, we shall not.

(I hopeth)

No Grumbles Day

2009-09-02T15:00:00.006-04:00

Today is a no grumbles day. It's important to have one of those, every once in a while. Some good things have happened lately. Herewith, a few of them, in no particular order:

My brother's grueling series of treatments is nearly finished. His courage continues to amaze me.

There were no bills in my mailbox today, and since I pay my bills and The Bear's bills, I'm happy about that.

I found a long-sleeved peach coloured cotton blouse on sale for $10.00, Bargains give me a little thrill.

The Bear's accountant has almost finished the tax return and has suggested another way to save tax dollars next year.

I received a belated birthday present - a Chapters gift certificate, and yes, I used it. I love going to bookstores, especially when I have money.

I finished revising a story this week and hope to get cracking on another one later today.

The weather is perfect today. We have had a lot of rain this summer and now - it is not too hot, not too cold, not too humid, and the sun is shining. Perfect!

Taking it Personally

2009-08-31T12:29:00.008-04:00

I've often been told I take everything too personally and that is certainly one of my many faults. One of my other faults is being stubborn and that brought results this month. I guess I need to apply that persistence to my writing. But by now you probably wonder what I'm talking about. I'm referring to finally receiving the Guaranteed Income Supplement (GIS), which is added to the Old Age Security payment for Canadian pensioners who are eligible. Ah yes, "eligible" as defined by our dear government and receivable - when they get around to it. Notice that part. I became eligible based on my 2008 taxable income which was minuscule, but I didn't receive any payment until this month (August). Why? Because the government does not look at the income tax reported by pensioners until June and they only consider those tax forms once a year (in June).

While I'm grateful to have the added income, I can't help but wonder why it took so long. After all, Revenue Canada would swiftly track me down if I owed any money. So the government's slow response irks me, but unless I want to start a protest movement there's nothing I can do about it except grumble, and tell you this. Don't let any senior you know (parent, friend, person-in-the-street) take money from their Registered Retirement Savings Account in order to survive until they are eligible for the GIS. 'Tis better to borrow than to use one's savings. You have been warned.

Don't Go In There Alone 2 Laundrygate

2009-08-27T06:22:00.011-04:00

My dear friend, The Viking, often tells the addicts he listens to not to spend too much time alone with their thoughts.

"It's scary in there," he says,

He's right, but I believe writers have to go into their mental attics often, if they are to produce anything real and lasting.

I've been in this world for a lot of years and there's a huge pile of stuff in my attic. Some of it is useful, some of it is gratifying, some of it is boring, some of it is mean-spirited (more on that later) and some of it is terrifying. I could easily get lost in there - I suppose that supports The Vikings point - but I always return.

Sometimes what I find distresses me. I was not happy to discover that I resent the success of other writers (I mean the bad ones) or to find out that my perfectionist tendencies are even more pronounced that I had believed.

Still, I have to go in there. It's where I find the best stuff for my work. I completely understand why many writers found it necessary to over-drink, or use other substances as a way to 'get in,' 'be in the zone," and cope with/ use what they find. However, for me, the larger problem is returning to the 'real' world. That's probably why if I have only half an hour for work, very little happens. Well, that's my excuse.

How do you 'get in' and how do you get out again?

On a lighter note, there is laundrygate. My friend (and my responsibility), The Bear, is in a supported-living retirement facility. Nine pieces of his laundry have not been returned. The articles went to the laundry on Wednesday. He has quizzed the staff relentlessly and thinks that they should have to replace his clothes, if the clothes don't return - immediately. I'm glad that was his only complaint today.

Montreal, je t'aime!

2009-08-17T10:34:00.008-04:00

My Montreal trip is over and I'm already wondering how I can save enough money to visit again, maybe two years from now.

On Monday, the train from Toronto to Montreal was full and I was fortunate to sit next to a young Quebecois woman who was returning home. We chatted and the time on the train passed quickly. Attention: writers of romance - the young woman, who is bilingual and works for the provincial government, said that she doesn't enjoy 'fiction' and only reads romance, because it is 'soft' and relaxing. She also asked if I was gong to visit the Basilica (de Notre Dame) and said I really must see it. I have been there before but planned to see it again.

It was after 4 p.m. by the time I reached my hotel (damn the stairs in the Sherbrooke Metro station), so I walked over to Rue St. Denis and found a restaurant for an early dinner, because I was very hungry. Via Rail will sell you a 'snack' but I had not indulged.

On Tuesday, I went to the Montreal Museum of Fine Arts and saw some of the permanent exhibitions, plus the Frederic Black exhibition. I admit, I knew nothing about Frederic Black before this. Now, I own a 4 DVD set of his animated films. The Museum is housed in two buildings and when I went outside to cross the street and visit the second building, there was a gorgeous vintage white Bentley at the curb. It was adorned with white bows, but the bride and groom were absent. The driver, who stood beside the car, was happy to answer my questions. He also took a picture of me sitting in the car. Perhaps I should have tipped him, but I was besotted by the car and didn't think of it. Later in the day I visited a shop that sells tablecloths and fabrics from Provence and found present I hope my daughter will enjoy. A good dinner was certainly in order after all my walking and wandering. I found a Bistro that had modest prices, and good food.

On Wednesday, I visited the Botanical Gardens. It took over an hour just to tour the ten greenhouses. Then there are the many gardens. I could only visit a few of them before my feet protested. It was a very hot day - that's my excuse. I also visited the Insectarium, which was filled with children and quite noisy, but fun. There's a small train that takes you around the whole of the Botanical Gardens, including the huge arboretum area, and it's free, so I went along for the ride. By late afternoon, I had wilted, though the flowers had not, and I bypassed visiting the Olympic tower and returned to my hotel via the Metro. When it was time to go out for dinner, I walked up St. Denis and eventually settled on another Bistro. This time, I was very lucky, the food was fabulous, the service was excellent, and the price was not as high as I had expected, though it certainly wasn't cheap. No matter - it was worth it!

Thursday was my last full day and I went to Old Montreal and revisited the Basilica de Notre Dame. After that, I needed a coffee, but not a six dollar coffee. I found a Starbucks. I was walking down toward the Port area when I came upon the Maison de Mere d'Youville. It was not in my guidebook, and it doesn't look as if it is open to the public. Still, I tried the door. It opened into a small office area but I could see antique furniture, and stone floors to one side. The receptionist spoke to me in French and asked if I would like a tour. When I replied 'yes,' she said if I would wait a few minutes she would furnish me with a guide who spoke English. An excited young woman soon arrived and gave me a personal tour. It lasted over an hour and the guide provided fascinating information. The Maison is on the site of the first Montreal Hospital, started by a group of religious 'brothers'. They helped the poor and sick men of Montreal in the 1700's. Eventually, they were unable to maintain the hospital. Then Marguerite d'Youville and a small group of women (they became the grey nuns) took it over, repaired it and helped as many of the poor and suffering people as they could - men, women and children. Would you believe they even took in prostitutes and abandoned babies? There is much more to the history, of course, and I am fascinated by the profound courage of Marguerite and the women who worked with her.

After a bit of shopping it was time for dinner and I returned to the Bistro I had enjoyed on Wednesday. It was a wise decision.

Friday, I returned home and I'm happy to be here. I missed out on Montreal Smoked Meat and Fairmont bagels; therefore, I'll have to go back, won't I?

Ready, Set, Go! The Value of Writing LIsts

2009-08-07T11:25:00.011-04:00

I leave for Montreal very early on Monday morning and will return on Friday evening. Before I go, I'll spend time with the Viking. Maybe we will go to some Blues Festival events, if the weather isn't miserable. There are lots of things I'd like to do and places I'd like to visit while I'm in Montreal, but I'm not making a list and will decide on my itinerary based on the weather, and my energy level, and how my knees hold out. (That reminds me - I need to look for a gentle exercise class when I return.) In any event, if it rains on Tuesday, I'll make that my museum visit day. Packing will take place the night before I leave, but I do know what's going into the suitcase.

It's wonderful to get out of town, even if it might be 'dangerous'. That's the word a neighbour used when I said I was going to Montreal, alone. She also said, "you're brave." Either I look older and more fragile than I am, or she was worried about Montreal drivers who have a reputation for running into pedestrians. I assured her I would be careful, and indeed, I will. I also plan to enjoy the city and all that it offers. Old Montreal, the museums, the food, the unique atmosphere, the elan of les Quebecois , and did I mention? - the food - seafood, tortiere, bagels, Montreal smoked meat, and whatever else appeals to me. I'd better do a LOT of walking, or I'll return thicker rather than thinner, but if the universe is kind, that won't matter, because I'll have had a marvellous, memorable time.

Going on a trip gives me the opportunity to do a 'restart' when I return. That's why I have a two writing lists posted where I can see them. The first one shows all of my short stories, the magazines they've been sent to in the past - and of course the results. The second list, which I composed this morning, shows the stories that need to be sent out again. A while back, in late spring, I made a similar list (stories to send out), posted it up where I could see it and it worked. I sent those stories out. Then there were multiple crises, including some I can't mention in my blog, and I admit, I had great difficulty in focusing on anything but the troubles. But now, ah now, I have a new list and it is posted on my wonderful new-to-me very large, cork bulletin board. It's a double-sided board and notes for my novel are on the other side. I've been thinking a lot about 'Jennie Carriere' and I'm sure my visit to Montreal will help me with that, too.

Montreal, Jane Austen, and Other Topics

2009-07-31T08:37:00.004-04:00

Thanks to Via Rail's temporary price reduction of train tickets, I will be going to Montreal for five days. I can hardly wait to visit one of my favourite cities. There's no doubt that I'll be immediately recognized as a tourist, since my clothing lacks style, I'll have to wear my running shoes, and my smattering of high school French may prove incomprehensible; nevertheless, I know I'll have an excellent time. There are many places I'd like to visit while I'm in the city so I went to the library to get a Montreal Guide. There was only one available - all the others were already on loan to other patrons. Perhaps Montreal is being inundated with les maudits anglais this summer. If so, then I hope Montrealers are still as tolerant as they were on my previous visits.

Before this unexpected opportunity arrived, I had been moping and reading, and fretting of course, as I often do when the Muse takes her leave. I recommend Carol Shield's short biography of Jane Austen, published by Penguin (2001) as part of the Penguin Lives series. If you are a writer, you will appreciate Shield's perceptive comments on writing and on the nature of a writer's life even if you don't like, or haven't read Jane Austen's novels. Though if you do know Jane's work, you will get even more from this book. Carol Shields writes clearly and without any academic frou frou.

And speaking of books and writers, my friend and fellow writer, Jennifer Ross' story, "The Colonial and the Cottontail" is now available in the Northern Roses, Southern Belles Civil War Anthology published by Wild Rose Press. The book is available through Amazon. I had the pleasure of reading and commenting on earlier versions of this story and am happy it has been published.

Now, I need to make a list of things to take on my trip, and of course paper and pens will be at the top, although usually I don't write much when I'm away from my home. Instead, I often get a new perspective on what I need to write, when I return. I hope that happens again, and I'll let you know if it does.

The Emergency Department Adventure and The News from Calgary

2009-07-26T10:02:00.005-04:00

Last night, I had the opportunity to see how the Emergency Department at St. Mary's hospital handles patients who are not bleeding but may be at serious risk. I accompanied The Viking to the hospital because his blood pressure was very high, and had been very high for over two days His bp was checked (still very high) and he was admitted to Emergency. Then we waited, behind curtain number 4, for three hours. There was only one doctor on duty and we did not see him, or her. After three hours of waiting, I asked if The Viking's blood pressure could be checked again. A nurse did that, and fortunately the b/p had come down close to what is normal for The Viking. So, he decided he might as well go home. Of course he had to sign an agreement saying that he was leaving without seeing a doctor.

All is well this morning, but I do wonder about a couple of things. If I hadn't been with the Viking, would they have checked on him sooner? Did staff expect that because someone was with him, that someone would inform them if there was a change that required their attention? I do know the signs of a stroke, but the staff at the hospital knew nothing about me. I am glad The Viking agreed to go to the hospital, though he is not sure he would do it again, given the care he didn't receive.

In other news, my friend Lori Hahnel, will be the Calgary Canadian Author's Association's Writer in Residence starting in September -- and her novel, Love Minus Zero has been nominated for a Calgary Public Library Literary Award. I'm thrilled for her, on both counts.

As for my writing, I had an encounter with the black dog, but have survived it and am doing a bit of work. That is also good.

How Teenagers Think

2009-07-14T07:09:00.006-04:00

As some of you know, I am the grandmother of two teenage boys. At times, it is an onerous task, at other times there is joy. Most times, there is confusion, my confusion that is. I'm quite sure that behind the volume of meticulously straightened hair which conceals the faces of F and S (my grandsons) there is a computer interface which automatically selects certain responses to information received from adults.

I can provide proof. A reconstructed conversation with S.

Me: When are you going to cut the lawn?
S: screen shows - No Signal
Me: Are you ever coming out of your room?
S: screen shows - No Signal

Thirty minutes later.
Me: You'd better cut the lawn, or else, when Mom and dad get home they'll be pissed off.
S. screen shows - blah blah blah, or else blah blah blah pissed off. Level 1 response required. Select a) yeah, okay, or b) yeah, in a few minutes.
S. responds Yeah, In a few minutes.

Thirty minutes later.
Me: Do it now, S!
S. screen shows - Now! High voice volume requires immediate response.
S. emerges from room for the first time in 18 hours and cuts the lawn, then returns to room and adjusts his internal computer screen to inactive listening mode.

Two hours pass.
Me: downstairs, in conversation with grandad and a long way from S.'s bedroom. - I hear there might be ice cream cake for Sam's birthday and that his present will be an Ipod touch gadget.
S. screen shows - blah blah blah ice cream cake, blah blah, present, blah blah Ipod. Bingo! Immediate response required!
S. emerges from his bedroom again. Yes, folks, it's a record, and says Hi - is there cake?

Dont Mess With My Morning Routine

2009-06-26T15:14:00.004-04:00

Yesterday was my birthday, number 65 plus one, and it was a mostly quiet day. My daughter took me out for lunch, then the Viking came over for tea and hugs after supper. I was quite content to have a low key celebration. partly because my foot was throbbing, and partly because so much has been happening to people I love that I needed some down time. Life has been way too eventful, but not in a good way, over the last few weeks. I may be wild and crazy sometimes, but on weekday mornings, I need - crave my routine. When it's interrupted things go awry, as they did on Wednesday morning.

I like to start my morning with coffee. All right then, I can hear the laughter- I need to start my morning with two cups of coffee. One starts the right ventricle and one starts the left. That's the rule. I have a wonderful new coffee maker, and right after I brush my teeth, etc. and turn on the computer, which needs time to load all it's functions, I fill the machine and start it. While the coffee brews, I open or close the windows depending on what the weather looks like. When the coffee is ready I take my cup to my desk, log on to the Internet and check my email. Doesn't everybody who writes do this first thing in the morning? There could be good news just waiting to be found and enjoyed.

But Wednesday morning, before I could pour out my coffee, the phone rang. In my un-coffeed state, I rushed to answer it. I'm not spatially deft before coffee and I failed to get completely around one of the living room chairs. I whacked two of the smallest toes on my right foot and limped over to the phone. Of course it was a wrong number. I promise myself, I won't rush to catch a phone call again. I'd like change other parts of my morning routine, but I'm not sure I can. I might be able to resist checking what's new with my friends who post on facebook, and I might be able to stop reading the morning headlines on the CBC website and the Maclean's magazine blogs. Those are the things I do before I write or revise, if I write or revise anything. But I'm not giving up coffee.

It's time to ice my toes.

Baby Steps

2009-06-12T07:53:00.007-04:00

I've stayed close to the telephone for what seemed like eons as I waited for news about my brother's health crisis. From the moment I first heard his diagnosis, it's been hard to focus on anything else. I spent lots of time on the Internet, researching his condition, and the options, and the possible outcomes. I also spent lots of time sending him energy, and visualizing better health for him. While all this was going on, (and is going on) three rejections of my work came in. They all arrived on Mondays. That didn't help me at all. But this week, I revised one of the stories that had been rejected and sent it out again. A baby step for sure, but at least I did something. Also, a story continues to ferment in my wee brain and I hope I'll soon be able to work on it.

Yesterday afternoon, I received news that my brother has improved after a horrendous Wednesday night . It's a tiny step forward, and a wobbly one, but I'm hugely thankful for any progress. Likely, I will visit him next week , if he is moved from intensive care to regular care. My sister-in-law tells me that given the massive amount of surgery he has undergone other setbacks may occur, but we are all more hopeful now.

I plan to visit John next week, if he is moved out of intensive care and into a regular room. At first, I thought I'd take the train, but it only goes to Windsor once a day and doesn't arrive till after 11 p.m., so I'll take the Greyhound bus instead. Thanks to everyone for your positive thoughts and prayers.

To end this on a very positive note, I'll mention that my friend, Lori Hahnel, has a short story collection coming out this fall. I highly recommend it and I know what I'm talking about. I've read most of the stories.You can read the blurb and pre-order it here:

http://www.chapters.indigo.ca/books/35/search?sc=Lori+Hahnel&sf=Author&pticket=e2q3w3zcotsmuae4fcildpfiAeysXgNEAsDFD%2fzBSl9kATAQ9HU%3d

Family News and the View from my Windows

2009-05-29T11:05:00.004-04:00

On Wednesday my daughter and I visited my brother in Tilbury. His grown children were also home that day. It was good to reconnect after such a long time.

This morning, my brother informed me that he will have his very major surgery a week from today, if nothing changes between now and the scheduled date. I'm glad it will be soon because, the sooner it's done the better his chances may be. I hope for the best possible outcome.

In the midst of all this, I'm comforted by what I can see through my living room windows. Verdant green tree tops, blue sky today, and part of the bell tower on the lovely stone church just south of here on Queen Street.

It's time to go for a walk and think healing thoughts.

Brief Update

2009-05-22T09:07:00.003-04:00

This may be the last blog entry for a while. Earlier this week, I learned that my brother is facing a health crisis and now that I have more details, I have plans to make. I hope to visit him very soon, once I find a way to get to his small town which is not on a bus or train route. It will be a short visit, a few hours, but I expect there will be more trips in the near future.

There's no writing news, and no writing taking place, for now. I hope to post better news soon.Until then, enjoy the spring and - carpe diem!

When Writers Read

2009-05-14T09:23:00.006-04:00

Our local library sponsors a writers' collective and this week, some members of the collective participated in a public reading of their work. The event was promoted in the library's magazine, In Touch, which is available free at all the libraries in the system and online. Most of the people who attended, including me, had some connection with the writers. However, at least some folk attended out of curiosity. You know the kind - what do those fiction writer critters look like in real life, and what do they produce? And, I bet I could do it better, if I had time.

I spoke with one such person after the reading, well, really, she accosted me. I guess she needed someone to hear her opinion and I was a slow moving target.

"Wasn't (name omitted) awful?" She asked.

"Some writers have trouble presenting their work," I replied.

That didn't satisfy her and she went to to say a few more uncomplimentary things. (I don't personally know the writer she was referring to, but felt I had to defend the writer, even though I partly agreed with the criticism.)

"Every one's taste is different," I said. Yeah, that was lame, but it did end the conversation, or else it ended because we were at the front door by then.

On the way home, I thought about the encounter a bit more. Not every writer is good at reading aloud in front of a group. It's not an easy thing to do. Some people have a flair for the dramatic and can make prose that wouldn't impress me a great deal if I was reading it on the page, sound more interesting that it truly is. It's good to have that talent because these days, published writers have to do more promotion than ever. The ability to put on a decent dog and pony show helps sales. It's hard for most writers though, or so I imagine. I do know it was difficult for me, and I've only done it once, so far. The audience I spoke to had paid to hear the writers spout off on different topics they claimed to know something about and read from their work. It was more than a little bit terrifying. Would they like my words or hate them? Would they throw things? Would they slink away and say nothing at all? Fortunately, terror helped me do a reasonable job. I'm sure that isn't the case for every writer and I have no idea whether I will be able to do it again, if the opportunity arises.

It's often hard to be one of them thar fiction writer critters. We're strange. We have egos that expand and shrink on a regular basis, maybe with the cycles of the moon, maybe not. We know everyone has a story but not everyone has a compulsion to tell stories. One is calling for me now. I'd better go and write it.

Lost Logic. Reset, Reset

2009-05-05T06:19:00.003-04:00

When I visit my friend, The Bear, at his retirement residence we often listen to music on compact discs. He has a marvellous CD player with great sound. It's much like the Bose player, but was somewhat less expensive. It also has a remote control. After a year of use, the battery in the remote control died. When I replaced it and tried to use the CD player, it wouldn't work. I couldn't discover what was wrong with it although I read the owner's manual. Have I said I'm technically inept before? Well, I still am. We had to wait until The Viking could arrange to look at it because he couldn't diagnose the problem over the phone. It took all of 10 seconds to fix it. He unplugged it, plugged it in again and hey presto! - it worked. The device had lost its logic, but regained it after it was restarted. If only I could reset my logic so easily.

Mostly, I think of myself as a reasonably logical person, but there are times when I'm not. Almost always, those times are connected with critiques of my writing. I can and do, fail to hear the 'good stuff." in fact, very recently I received a critique from ye Canlit star and the list of "the good stuff'' had to be repeated before I could manage to hear it. But, I seldom have a problem hearing and magnifying any faults that are pointed out to me.

Maybe I'm like this because praise was only doled out in infrequent and minuscule amounts during my early childhood and when it was meted out, a caveat inevitably appeared in the same sentence. That rule was scrupulously followed in order to ward off something - bad Karma, evil spirits, an inflated ego, or so I assume.

It's evident I need a reset button. Luckily, I can imagine I have one. There, I've pressed it. Now it's time to go back to work.

Spring Fever. The Writing Round-up

2009-04-21T21:39:00.004-04:00

Earlier this month, I posted a list of writing tasks on the large piece of styrofoam that is my cheap alternative to a real bulletin board. I stare at it every morning and finally, about two weeks ago, I started to work on it in earnest. May is almost here and many literary magazines do not accept submissions in the summer time.

So, in a burst of energy, and/or desperation, I chose four of the stories on the list, they were ones I had revised again. I gave them a final polish and sent them out. It's good to have things back out on the road.

I also drafted and revised an essay and submitted it to my favourite website because it was too long for all the magazines I investigated.

If the birds don't wake me up at 5:30, I hope to sleep in tomorrow. I haven't completed the whole list, but there are still a few days left in the month.

The round-up will continue in a day or two, if I still have spring writing fever and I hope I will.

Writing and Self-Confidence

2009-04-04T07:34:00.005-04:00

I was thinking about writing the other day. Actually, I do quite a lot of thinking about writing, as opposed to actually getting down to work and writing. Anyway, I find that my confidence level is extremely variable.

I'm seldom happy with a first draft but by the time I finish a third draft, or somewhere in that vicinity, I think what I have is really good. If I'm feeling brave, I send it out. Yay for me and all that. By the time I get the rejection - which might be six months later - and look at the piece again, all I can see are the flaws, and there are always lots to see. I'll sneak in a music reference here. I might see the third or fourth draft as a symphony, or, at the very least, a good sonata, when I send it out. Then later (after those six months pass) when I have to look at again, it appears to be a very trite and unsaleable pop song.

It's hard to deal with these fluctuations in confidence. I hope I'm learning to be somewhat more objective. In some ways, I think I've progressed as a writer. I have learned its a long process and I have gained at least a little objectivity about my work. That's a continuing struggle though - as it probably is for everyone else who writes.

Perhaps a bit of early success temporarily spoiled me. It's all a balancing act. Nothing I write will ever be anywhere near perfect. I'm extremely aware of that but I also have to maintain a reasonable amount of belief in what I do, and be able to hear criticism and not cringe, and be able to sort out the just criticism from the less-than-just criticism. I'm working on that. I'll probably always have to work on that.

And speaking of work, I better get back to the fourth draft of one of my short stories.

The Almost List, and A Few Other Things

2009-03-12T17:06:00.003-04:00

A number of things are almost done, or almost ready to be started. The renovation of my daughter's kitchen is almost finished and probably will be complete sometime next week. That means it's almost time for the cat to go home. The Viking is almost ready for the movers and they will arrive on Tuesday. It's almost time for school spring break. And finally, it's almost time to go back to work on the novel.

The other things -

My daughter and son-in-law's company participates a number of good things and this is one of them.

http://re-nourish.blogspot.com/2009/03/update-from-team-3-week-2.html

The mysterious appearance and disappearance of a large picture,which hung in the corridor outside my apartment has not been solved. A smaller painting is now sitting on the floor in the corridor and no one knows where it came from. It is a mild and unobjectionable painting so perhaps in due course, it will hang on the wall somewhere. Either that, or it too will disappear.

And speaking of mysterious disappearances, I may have mentioned that my hairdresser disappeared. I really hate having to find another one. Soon it will be too warm to wear a hat so I must take action and risk trying someone new.

And last, but definitely far from least, I must mention the mystery novelist I enjoyed. Jane Haddam has written 17 Gregor Demarkian novels. I've read two of the later ones in the series -Somebody Else's Music and Glass Houses (St. Martin's Press) - and enjoyed them. Gregor, the protagonist used to head the FBI Behavioural Services Unit, but don't let that put you off. He's fascinating and so is the woman in his life, Bennis. I could read a whole novel about them without the mystery element, though I'm quite glad to have that as well. Jane Haddam is not afraid to write long paragraphs that contain reflections, observations, and detailed place descriptions and she's able to do that without detracting from the plot. Maybe I admire that a lot because it's something I need to work on in my own writing. I plan to read more of them and hope that the library has all the books in the series.

Oh, and one more almost. It's almost spring.

Behoodled and Befuzzed

2009-03-05T08:38:00.005-05:00

Things get stranger by the day.. My struggle with the Canada Revenue Agency continues and I will spare you the ugly details. I'm behoodled. That word isn't in my Canadian Oxford Dictionary and I had never heard it until a couple of days ago when The Viking used it. I think it's probably a localism (if that's a word) and according to The Viking, his mother used it to describe being confused or befuddled.

The word would also apply to my daughter's lawn care company's situation - and all the other lawn care companies in Ontario. The new rules governing pesticide use come into force on Earth Day, but were not published until late yesterday. Of course lawn care businesses had to order their supplies well before the information came out so it was like playing roulette, only the odds were even worse than spinning the wheel. The most confusing thing is that golf courses CAN use pesticides. They must have lobbied pretty hard to achieve that.

While I'm on the subject of words, I'll mention befuzzed. I haven't found it in my dictionary, though it could exist somewhere. Anyway, I rather like it. My carpet is befuzzed - it catches Dopeycat's very fine, almost invisible hairs and holds them. Even the bathtub is befuzzed in the morning because Dopey goes in there when I'm asleep. My clothes are befuzzed and my mind is too. At least everything matches.

Two Word Answers to Those Pesky Questions

2009-02-25T09:18:00.000-05:00

I've discovered some new-to-me ways to deal with questions I don't want to answer. This may or may not be useful information for anyone else, but it works for me.

There are a only few people who know that I am working on a novel. Unfortunately, two of those people are neighbours of mine. One is a very sweet teacher who happened to notice me at a writers' workshop a couple of years ago and asks about my work every time she sees me. The second person is a retired man who only asks me about my progress after he has imbibed fortifying liquids in large quantities. When they ask 'how's it going?" I used to mumble and stumble through an explanation. I've given that up and have decided use - "can't say" or "no comment." I think the no comment thing could add mystery so I'll try that one out.

The other pesky question I encounter with some frequency is "why not?" As in: Why not buy a subscription to this magazine for only $15.95? Why not donate to this charity again? Why not have your carpets cleaned? - We'll give you a discount. I used to reply "no thanks" but they would keep on talking unless I hung up. So, now I take a different approach. When the "why not" question arises, I say, "I'm broke." I'm happy to report that this works quite well. I've even received apologies, though I assume they are only offered by callers who are new at telemarketing. I wonder if it works because it's different, or because hardly anyone wants to use those words. So far, no one has asked me what I mean by broke, but I do have a personal definition.

Broke means that by the end of the month I have spent all the money received in the previous month, and sometimes a bit more. It's not a technically correct definition, but so what.

And speaking of 'so what,' that might be a handy phrase to use when I visit my always grumpy friend this afternoon. He tends to raise minor complaints to major heights. I likely won't do it, but I know I will be tempted.

Back on the Fiction Track

2009-02-11T11:16:00.000-05:00

It's good to be back in fiction writing mode. I began to wonder if it would ever happen again. In any event, a story came to mind a few days ago. I wasn't sure how to end it but the ending came to me out of the blue yesterday afternoon. I'd had one idea but then a second idea took over more or less in spite of me. I forgot to eat supper until about 7:30, normally I try to eat between 5 and 6:30, but I'm sure it didn't hurt to wait. I hope I'll still like the story after a few days have passed.

My feline editor has stopped trying to retype every word for me. He's been distracted by the smells that come through the window. The grass is emerging from under its snow blanket and the birds and squirrels are busy. I'm pleased that I can see some green, but of course, N. is not. She is super-stressed at the moment. It's always that way as spring approaches. This year there are added complications, what with renovations underway, the need to get ready to go to Mexico on Monday, and the continuing uncertainty about the pesticide laws and issues. I hope it all works out.

In other news, the Viking and I will have the pleasure of attending a birthday party in Toronto on Sunday afternoon . It's for a close friend who will be celebrating the end of one decade and the beginning of another. I'll l also see friends I haven't seen in eons.

It's also been good to see my words online. Okay, so it's not a huge deal , but it's something and I needed the boost. It gave me some energy.

Looking at this link also sometimes cheers me. I usually check it every other week or so to see if there is new addition.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/series/writersrooms

Nap Prevention News and How to Kill Appliances

2009-02-02T15:03:00.000-05:00

The guest cat is now ensconced at my place and has taken over. Dopey is very dog-like. He follows me wherever I go and demands to be petted. He also likes to supervise everything. I had cat assistance whilst writing a letter to the editor and so it took twice as long to complete. But never mind - I wrote it this morning and The Record called before noon. So, they may publish it, after they chop it. (I hope they don't take out the reference to the evils committed by the Harris government, but I'm not betting money on that, or on the letter seeing print either.)

I thought I'd take a nap this afternoon, but apparently, only the cat is allowed to take naps in the afternoon - and the evening - and the late morning. The naps are required so that he can wake me in the middle of the night by pouncing on my feet. I had forgotten that cats love to do that.

I have a talent which can be loaned out for a price. I kill appliances and I can manage to do it quickly. I was given two humidifiers at Christmas time. One lasted three days. I'm told that my water caused it to die, but I used filtered water so I must have jinxed it just by looking at it. The second one is so noisy that I can't sleep when it's on. It's not supposed to be so loud and probably it wouldn't be, if it was owned by someone else. I've returned to using my old vaporizer. There is also a problem with my coffee maker. I cracked the carafe (which was made of thin glass, honest). Then I bought a replacement carafe which was supposed to fit all coffee makers of the same brand. It doesn't. My computer printer had a conniption the other day and only agreed to operate properly after it was turned on and off several times. Perhaps I've neglected it and, like the cat, it needed constant attention. There has been a persistent rumour that I might receive a flat screen television sometime this year. I'm afraid that if I do, something strange will happen to it.

I am happy to report that my twenty-five year old stereo still works. Maybe I should acquire only used appliances. I'll have to think about that.

Meanwhile, at my daughter's house, all the appliances have been removed from her kitchen and she reports that there's nothing like the smell of cupboards being sawed apart in the early morning. I agree with that.

Welcome to 2009

2009-01-07T08:56:00.000-05:00

I hope the new year will bring good things to all of you.

As for me, I'm going to run away from home on a regular basis. First, I'm taking a mini-vacation out of town. After I get back and get more organized (okay, try to get more organized), I plan to spend at least a couple of afternoons each week at the library. They have large tables there and I can spread out my opus and make notes on index cards, research some things that I need more information on and so forth. This plan will keep me away from the Internet - one of the main time wasters in my life - and far from telemarketers and other nuisances. I think It will help me to focus.

But before I can set it in motion, I have to prepare for a few things, including the arrival of a cat. Since my daughter's kitchen will undergo a massive renovation beginning in late January, her cats need temporary shelter. I have volunteered to keep Dopey for a while. I like Dopey. He's smart and laid back and I'm sure we will get along. He has big hair though - in fact most of him is hair. I'll have to lay in a supply of tissue since I'm bound to sneeze a lot.

I've made lots of resolutions for 2009, but in the end they boil down to one, to be more disciplined and write regularly. I'll let you know how that works out.

After Christmas

2008-12-26T21:40:00.000-05:00

Christmas is over for another year. Everything winds down quickly, for me anyway, after The Day. I was tempted to follow my daughter's Boxing Day tradition and wear my pajamas all day, but I needed to go out for a little while. I did wear my new cozy robe until about 11 a.m. and was deliciously lazy.

I may have a turkey hangover. Or it could be that I'm suffering from the now-I-have-to-get-back-to-work syndrome. Yes, that's likely it. You see, I have this new chair. I have 500 sheets of paper and I have envelopes too. I need to consolidate Jennie into one document, find out how long it is, and start revising again. But I also have a wonderful book I'm savouring - The Time Traveller's Wife. And just when I thought I'd have no more excuses, The Viking called a moment ago and he will be here tomorrow. My holiday is not over yet after all.

'Twas the Week before Christmas

2008-12-15T21:40:00.000-05:00

Christmas is not quite here, but already the Viking Santa has brought presents. There's a dandy new humidifier that does a much better job than my wee vaporizer could and then there's The Chair. Not just any chair, but a black leather high-backed every-which-way adjustable swivel chair, with arms. "A chair fit for a writer," the Viking said. And it is.

A Weird Start to December

2008-12-06T12:53:00.000-05:00

I don't know about you, but I'll certainly remember this week. It sure was weird. Many of us, --well I was anyway-- were glued to the news as our Parliamentarians bashed each other, and the nation. I'm disappointed with almost every darn one of them, and with a lot of my fellow Canadians too. It's not over of course. My Christmas wish is for an end to the divisiveness that's still being actively promoted.

In other, and also weird news, the government in it's great wisdom (yes, that's sarcasm) has decided that I am not eligible for the Guaranteed Income Supplement because I took a one-time lump-sum amount out of my RRSP in 2007 . I declared the income on my tax return and income tax had been deducted at source. They have again added that amount into my 2008 income. I didn't get that money this year and I fail to see why it is counted as 2008 income. Isn't that penalizing me twice? I thought that was illegal but have been informed I should refer to Bill C-36, passed by guess whom in July 2008, which says the lump sum I received in 2007 must be included in my estimated income (for 2008). Yikes! Have I talked about this before, perhaps I'm becoming demented and can apply for help on those grounds? On the same day that the benevolent government rejected my appeal, they sent me the Bear's tax refunds for the last twelve years. The amount, which is greater than my entire income this year, included exactly $17.32 cents in interest. The money would probably have collected more if it had been kept in a mattress - at least it would have accumulated some lint.

This afternoon I might put up the Christmas tree or work on my novel, if I can manage to focus. Or I could look for a main dish recipe to feed six or maybe eight people. I'm having the family here for dinner, so Frank and Sam each count as two when portions are considered.

And this just in, as they say on the news, my downstairs neighbour called a minute ago and asked me if I wanted her ticket to the symphony tonight because she cannot go. I have the ticket now. It's the KW Symphony- Jazz meets Orchestra concert. That certainly perks up my Saturday. Hope yours contained a good surprise too.

Keep warm folks.

A Circus - But Where's the Meat?

2008-12-01T15:04:00.000-05:00

Have Roman times returned? I do wonder. We have the circus that is the current Parliament to amaze and horrify us - but where's the meat?

I am appalled at the current Federal government's lack of understanding and lack of action re the economic crisis. Why don't they understand what will happen to ordinary Canadians if the auto industry and the forest industry fall apart? Of what use is an economics degree, when theory is all you know? And why must Ontario, which for years was the economic engine of the country, become the major victim of decreased equalization payments. For "make no mistake," as a certain person was wont to say, those payments will not increase - which will equal a decrease. The current federal finance minister wreaked havoc in Ontario (when he was Provincial finance minister)and we are still living with the consequences. Ontarians who receive Ontario Works (which replaced Welfare) get a grand total of $560 per month and $349.00 of that is for housing. No wonder the poor buy bread and sometimes vegetables but cannot afford meat.

If a coalition government can be formed. I'm in favour of it. After all - it's unlikely to be worse and could quite possibly be better.

Now that that's off my chest, maybe I can stop reading the political blogs and get back to work.

Need a Christmas Present - Buy This book

2008-11-17T10:23:00.000-05:00

Love Minus Zero, my friend Lori Hahnel's book is now available through Oberon Press. It can also be found through Chapters Indigo.

http://www.chapters.indigo.ca/books/search?keywords=Hahnel&pageSize=10

Here's a quote from the book jacket: "Love Minus Zero is a novel set in Calgary's 1979 punk scene. It deals with a teenager's obsession with music, a singer and her own band, ending with her growing disillusionment with the undergound scene to which she belongs. Lori Hahnel was herself a founding member of the Virgins, Calgary's first all-femal rock band, so the story is told with all the freshness and immediacy of first-hand experience."

Remembrance Day

2008-11-10T09:59:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow is Remembrance Day.

Some quotes from my grandfather's letters home. He joined the Canadian Epeditionary Forces 70th Battalion in 1915 and wrote home as often as he could. He went from the tiny village of Highgate Ontario to London Ontario where he enlisted and began training.

from England, summer 1916. "I have the best score of the Brigade 4 batts (target shooting) have got my chance to go to France and you can bet I'm going to take it. Will be home for Xmas and expect to have a good dinner."

Somewhere in France July 1916 "I read your letters by candle light. We work at night. It wouldn't be good for a persons health to do it in the daylight. It's great sport digging in the dark. You would think there was a thunderstorm all day.It don't bother us here though it's all going overhead."" 58th Batt

Somewhere in France 1916 "We are going back into the trenches tonight ... it's a job to write a letter with nothing to write about. You write often as you have news and I have none that I dare write."

Somewhere in France Aug 1916 "I was in a bombing post quite a ways in front of our front-line trench. Our Colonel has been granted the D.S.O. for work the Batt did on the 13th of June. Joe W. came out suffering shell shock his nerves are all gone so Watkins and I are alone now."

Somewhere in Belgium Aug 1916 "We have turned our Ross rifles in (the Ross rifle was badly made to put it politely) and been given Lee Enfields"

Somewhere in Belgium Aug 1916 ".. excuse this dirty paper .. everything is muddy and dirty. I was was just looking at my rifle. It's so muddy that the only way you could tell it is a rifle is by the shape of the chunk of dirt. One of my chums was killed last night .. a rifle grenade burst almost beside him and he was killed instantly. The place where we were working was a little hill and has caused some of the hardest fighting near here. "

Somewhere in France Sept 1916 "Say, if you have a few bugs or lice of any kind around, I wish you would send me some to fight with what we've got.

Liechester Engand 1916 "I came from the trenches on the 20th Sept with a bullet hole in the first finger of my left hand. It smashed the bone into pieces. We were on the Somme front then. .. We had left all our equipment behind us as we were making a charge near the village of Courcellete (near Porriers) Before that we had been in the Ypres salient. Joe W was killed on hill 60. The more a person sees of war the less he wants to. It's all right to fill up histories but this is not war its just murder. "

Rockhampton England 1916 "Well, Mother it's just six months almost to the hour since I got on the train in London Ontario to come to England.... I am a lot wiser than I was the night I came away with the 70th batt that will never see Canada again. I don't believe there were many who failed to do their duty when they were put to the test."

Somewhere in France Feb 1917 "I haven't had any pay for almost a month now and our rations aren't overly large. I am pretty near froze out so I will ring off for this time."

Somewhere in France Mar 1917 "I have been into the supports and living within easy shelling range for quite a while. Will likely be back to the real business in about 15 days. (After I get home) I won't be as particular what I eat ... after a person gets good and tired and soaking wet besides being awful hungry, almost anything tastes good."

Somewhere in France April 10 1917 "The last three or four days I have been going nearly night and day. ... We are taking bombs and ammunition up the line and at night we take up rations."

Several postcards from the front marked - I am well.

London Dec 1917 "We had just moved out of the line at Ypres where we made old Fritz more back quite a piece."

London Dec 1917, just before he was sent back to France "It seems awful to have to go back again but a person might just as well be over there as here."

France Feb 1918 "I have been back (in France) almost two months. I am still with the mule train but ... I have been off duty for the last two days. .. a little piece of shrapnel in my back."

Postcards from the front.

France July 1918 "There is more work here but not nearly so many trips up the line. There are always two men with every transport driver. If anything happens to the driver the other man has to take his place."

France Aug. 1918 "For the last two weeks I've been driving a team of mules that haul a machine gun. .. I haven't much news that I can tell out. You will know almost as much of what is going on as we do."

France Oct 1918 "I am alive and well and got through another big do safe."

France Oct 1918 "She's a great old war, but I wish she would soon quit."

November 21 1918 "Just a little letter to let you know I have outlived the war and am wishing I was back home ... it will be quite a while yet before that."

He finally arrived back in Canada in the spring of 1919.

When November Arrives

2008-11-08T08:40:00.000-05:00

I always feel blue in November. Maybe it's because of the short days, or the bare trees, or the memories of past Remembrance Days. Or, maybe it's because what I've managed to write so far this year seems stale and flat. There are good things though, so I'll mention them.

Today is the last day for fertilizer applications, etc. for my daughter's lawn care company and the weather throughout the season has been outstanding for lawns.

My friend, Lori Hahnel, has her book launch on November thirteenth followed by a three-city tour. And, a copy of her book should arrive in my mailbox before long.

The scale my daughter keeps on her treadmill tells me that I haven't gained any weight - or lost any either. That is satisfactory, but not exciting.

The Viking's vision problem is stable and he can continue to drive.

Frank and Sam still play with their Lego stuff when no one is watching. Don't tell.

Obama was elected.

Good Times With Gangsters

2008-10-31T11:47:00.000-04:00

I received a last-minute invitation from my daughter and so, I went to a dinner theatre event yesterday evening. Big Al's Birthday Party was a comedy filled with puns, some funny, and some bad, but I had a good time. You see, there were some handsome young gangsters at my table. The event was a benefit for the Kidney Foundation and attendees were asked to dress in gangster fashion, or some resemblance thereof. because the silly play was about gangsters. Nutrilawn had sponsored two tables for staff and each staff person could bring a guest. I was pleased to be sitting with four of the lawn-care technicians. Three of them had taken the trouble to dress like gangsters from the forties, complete with hats, dark suits and splashy ties. Oh they were fine! James, one of the technicians, won the prize for best male costume. My leather gaucho hat and black outfit got a number of compliments and young woman in full flapper regalia won the prize for best female costume.

There was a silent auction too and I bid on something that no one else seemed interested in. As a result I purchased an interior and exterior car wash for a song. So, the Viking will soon be able to treat his green van to a fresh look.

Halloween evening is probably going to be dull in comparison, since children are not allowed to trick or treat at our building, but I won't mind, I'll still be smiling.

My Memory Bank Is Overloaded, Or Should I Say Overdrawn?

2008-10-24T16:37:00.000-04:00

Today, I received a kind notice from one of my bank credit cards. We are changing things, it said. We are increasing your security, oh and by the way,we are also increasing your fees. I'm not perturbed about fee increases because I always pay the total balance outstanding, so I pay no interest or fees. It's good to hear about increased security, I suppose, but they suggest I change my access number and Internet password every 90 days. Yikes! I will have to remain insecure, because I can't do that. My memory bank is already overloaded.

When I think of all the passwords and numbers I already have to remember, I shudder. It must be the same for lots of us. For instance, I have to remember the access numbers for my two bank cards and for one bank card that accesses one of The Bear's bank accounts. Then there are the Internet passwords and number codes for three different on-line bank accounts.

My Norton Internet computer security program keeps telling me I have passwords that could be too easy to crack even though they are made-up and make no sense. Who exactly would bother to try to do that?

And then there are numerous user names and passwords to remember for Internet boards and sites I belong to. Sometimes I don't visit a site for a while, then I have to search through my congested memory for the right access words.

Having to remember passwords and numbers and codes doesn't stop there. I need to enter a number code to access any telephone calls I've missed. My daughter's front door has coded access. And, if I want to get any information from the government, for instance, the status of my GIS appeal, I must recite my social security number. Thank goodness that number is engraved in my brain and pops up automatically.

Other numbers are not quite so easily remembered. I had to recall my home telephone number the other day, the gears in my head spun madly and the first number that came to mind was my old Toronto telephone number. I'm sure there was a slight smell of brain cells overheating before my current telephone number finally came to mind.

Maybe I should make a file with all that information in it. But then, I'd have to remember where I put the file and I already have a two-drawer filing cabinet full of stuff, a top-of-desk file, a to- be-filed pile, and, a large file box full of The Bear's financial stuff.

I think I'll have a cup of tea, instead.

Well - It could have been worse. maybe.

2008-10-15T08:38:00.000-04:00

So, we have another minority Conservative government. The results do not reflect the will of the people but it is done. I'm glad the Conservatives did not get a majority and I certainly thank the voters of Quebec for that. I think Harper will not be able to do anything too outrageous because if all three opposition parties vote together they can prevent serious harm to our social programs and to health care. Still, I admit, I am sad. The Conservatives by won by the adroit manipulation of Canadians' fears and by the use of smear tactics. If only the Liberals and the New Democrats could unite, then the government would truly reflect what most Canadians want. Well, I can dream can't I?

In other, more positive news, my Viking does not have a cracked rib. It was a pulled muscle. The holiday weekend weather was very kind and the Viking's cooking was excellent. I'm also happy that my friend, the bear, is absorbed in the run-up to baseball's world series. It keeps him amused and occupied, most of the time.

It's time for me to stop grousing and get to work on Chapter 24. Good night, Mrs. Calabash, wherever you are.

The Leader's Debates. Some Brief Observations

2008-10-03T14:27:00.000-04:00

I saw part of the French language debate on the CBC website. There was simultaneous translation. In my opinion Mr.Dion did very well, as did Ms. May, although her French is basic and Mr. Duceppe also made good points.

No doubt there was a bigger audience for the English language debate last night. I watched the whole thing and I thought the format was a big improvement over the lectern style used in previous years. Sometimes, though, the moderator should have been more stern with the participants.

Most people, I think, were surprised by how well Ms. May did. She stuck to the facts and kept presenting them, though she did take a dig at Mr. Harper, referring to him as a fraud. Mr. Dion was more low-key but came across as sincere, particularly when I spoke about 'my Canada' you could see that he means what he says and is passionate about it in a typically modest Canadian fashion. Also, I had no problem understanding his English and am beginning to resent all the attacks on it that people, particularly on the CBC website, make. Mr. Layton specialized in interrupting others, and I didn't think that was a good idea. His best line was the sweater remark. He certainly let us know that corporations would be taxed more and average people would be taxed less. Mr. Duceppe was at his best, engaging and straight-forward, too bad he's for Quebec sovereignty.

What can I say about Mr. Harper? He tried to act in a rather presidential manner, calm and patronizing. He didn't present a platform, and still has not done so. He prefers to attack others, and to tell us that everything is fine and dandy in the rose garden. There is something going on behind that facade of a face. He never looked anyone directly in the eye and his expression was a strange, closed grin. I thought he came across as entirely without passion, or compassion. Furthermore, underneath that eerie calmness, I suspect he is a very angry man who resents having to put up with the democratic process.

So, there you have it. One Canadian's opinion.

Haper Gives Me a Headache

2008-09-29T09:48:00.000-04:00

To reverse Harper's attack ad aimed at Dion, one might ask, what kind of leader is Harper? Autocratic is the answer He keeps his troops well-muzzled and would like to do the same thing to the arts community. His attack on the arts and artists, was ably countered by Margaret Atwood and I think also that les Quebecois are less than pleased. But, of course, people in the arts are all feeding from the public trough and should keep quiet.

Harper is also the only party leader who has refused to respond to Make Poverty History. Probably because he's sure that a lot of the poor won't vote, so it doesn't matter.

Then there's the -- our economy is fine, oops, wait a minute, nope, we are in trouble and only I can save us. Actually, the only thing that might save us is to take a completely new approach, bite the bullet and move toward a green economy.

That's enough about politics so I'll move on to more enjoyable things.

The Word on the Street event took place yesterday and we had sunshine. There were not as many booths as in previous years and NONE of the political parties were there. I wanted to contribute to the save Al Purdy's house fund, but couldn't take advantage of the - contribute $25.00 and get a free book deal. I do have the address though and can send a smaller donation.

Purdy was an excellent, and accessible Canadian poet. The house was due to be sold because his widow couldn't maintain it. She proposed turning it into a writer's retreat if enough money can be raised. For more information see
www.savealshouse.wordpress.com/

I was happy to find Brucedale press was at Word on the Street again, they publish writers who live in the Bruce Peninsula area. New this year, The Book Band which represents four or five small press publishers in the part of Ontario.

Fret Nots

2008-09-18T10:04:00.000-04:00

I looked up the meaning of fret in my Canadian Oxford Dictionary and was pleased to discover that the fifth meaning applies to water - move in agitation or flow or rise in little waves. I like that and might use it in my fiction. But, at the moment, I'm working on not fretting, which the COD also describes as intermittent whimpering. I'd rather growl, or provoke laughter than whimper.

My adventures with Human Resources Development Canada and with Canada Post could make a good comedy sketch starring yours truly. I'm now a woman of reduced means, as they said in Victorian times, and I reapplied for the Guaranteed Income Supplement based on the severe drop in my 2008 income. An obliging HRDC staff person filled out the form. I did not understand the arcane formula used to decide what goes on the form but I signed it because it appeared to be correct. The form was sent to the HRDC gods in Chatham Ontario. After an ice age passed, they replied. They said no, but provided an avenue for appeal. I sent a registered letter stating relevant details to HRDC. Nothing happened. After a six week wait, I called HRDC and they informed me that no letter had arrived. I called Canada Post. They told me the letter went out on August 7th, and we don't know what happened to it after that. In three months, we might know, but until then - no luck for you. So, yesterday, I called HRDC again and they told me to go to the local office and resend the information. It took a mere two hours to get it done, again. After that experience, I feel that the $12..00 registered letter fee would have been better spent on some frivolous thing, like a four slice pizza. I also feel like a Monty Python character, perhaps the one in the dead parrot sketch. But I will not fret, that would be unbecoming for a person of my lowly status. Instead, I'm practicing my growl, in case I have do go through this for the third time.

I'm not going to fret much about the stock markets going haywire either. We are all involved in the U.S. economic mess because our government puts some of our money in the market and the Bank of Canada is helping prop up the perpetrators. I think I'll emulate Alfred E. Neuman "What, me Worry?" Nope, not me. I'll do what the rest of the low-income people do and squander my money on necessities and three lottery tickets a week instead of one, thereby vastly increasing my odds from one in a billion to perhaps one-and-a-half in a billion. We who inhabit the low income zone are a feckless lot and frequently give in to our need for possible immediate gratification.

I'm also not going to whimper about the fact that my daughter will turn 44 on Monday. I'll save my sniveling for when she turns 45 - then she'll be what people refer to as middle-aged and we can get together and grumble about it.

It's time to shop for a birthday card and a present for N. Something frivolous, of course.

They're Off and Running - I am too.

2008-09-07T15:42:00.000-04:00

The Canadian election campaign has officially started. Of course, it started ages ago, but never mind. All the horses are out of the gate and on the track now. We will likely see all the major party leaders visit this part of Ontario more than once. I note that Smilin' Jack has Calgary as his first stop. That should be tons of fun.

I hope the coverage of the campaign will be fair to all the parties, well, I can hope, And, I hope that the Liberals keep to the high road and don't fulfill Harper's predictions.

This week, I have a lot of different chores and appointments jammed into a few days, so I'll be running too.

Pass the Hot Potatoes

2008-09-02T17:45:00.000-04:00

Here an election, there an election, and in both places - there are hot potatoes. Canadians can look forward to, or dread, an election on October 14. That's not a surprise because the Conservatives have been campaigning madly for weeks, or is that months? I think the two hot potatoes are the environment and the economy. Harper, he of the rigid hair and attitude, will focus on the economy and will denigrate the Liberal's plans for the environment. It appears that Dion will continue to present the Green Shift as his major platform plank. I hope he can manage to convince voters of its validity and its sanity. If our environment becomes more and more toxic, the effects will be far worse than a dip in the national economy.

It could be argued that calling an election now is illegal, but it's unlikely that there will be much focus on that particular issue. The PM says that Parliament was not working, meanwhile his party generated a booklet that was all about how to obstruct the business of the house and stall committee work.

There is also the money-in money-out scandal and the Chuck Cadman problem.Of course, the Conservatives will do their best to ignore all this. They will likely to continue to refer to Dion as ineffective and to Harper as a 'strong leader'.

I believe we should be wary of that 'strong leader' rhetoric. Even Harper's method of increasing funding for the Armed Forces could be criticized, if Dion wanted to. Dion's partner/wife, Janine Krieber, is an renowned expert in anti-terrorism who teaches at RMC. She believes that Canada's military can do its best when thoroughly and expertly trained and prepared etc. Might - in other words - is not the definitive answer to terrorism. History proves that's true, but, alas history has been ignored by Harper, who prefers to theorize on the virtues of unrestrained capitalism.

Meanwhile, south of the border, there are also hot potatoes. The Republican presidential candidate has chosen a woman to run as the VP candidate. She is much younger than McCain and has far less experience. That could be a problem, but the bigger problem, which no one is addressing, is her belief system. One important example: abstinence is the only sex education that should be funded and taught. How unrealistic! As a mother, I sympathize with her and with her teenage daughter who is now pregnant. But, I am also concerned for the young man who is the father of the child. Yes, he should admit responsibility and do his best to provide for the child, but must he marry her? It would tidy up the situation, but what does he want to do? I suspect we'll never know. As a side note to all this, the rate of teenage pregnancies in the U.S., which had slowly fallen for several years, has now risen again. Does abstinence only sex-education have anything to do with this? I think it may. We are all fallible, and promises made in good faith are sometimes broken.

Mrs. Palin took on the 'old boys club' in Alaska, but now, she wants to become a member of the most powerful old boys club in the world. Irony abounds.

Defeat the Conservatives Before They Ruin Canada

2008-08-13T16:01:00.000-04:00

The political junk mail from the Conservative party which arrives in my mail box on a daily basis has thoroughly pissed me off. I was already angry with Harper and his minions, but now the pot is really bubbling. Therefore I created a facebook group - Defeat the Conservatives Before They Ruin Canada. Maybe I'm returning to my radical, shit-disturbing roots. We'll see what happens. I know I will post a manifesto on the page. I know I'll ask friends to join the group. I'm not sure what else I'll do - yet, but I will take other actions.

In family news, my son-in-law's mother passed over to a better world. She was a very loving person and her children adored her. On a brighter note, I'm happy that I've been able to get some writing done, send a story out and postpone cleaning my apartment. And now, back to work.

I'll Always Remember The First Time

2008-08-11T10:35:00.000-04:00

I'll always remember the first time my grandsons attended a major live outdoor rock concert (without an adult family member), and I rather think they will too. The concert took place in Downsview Park on Friday afternoon and evening. On Saturday night there was a major propane explosion just south of the area.

The drive to Toronto took well over two hours, though there were no closed lanes, the problem was simply volume of traffic. Of course, the boys were anxious to arrive. Nancy dropped them off at the park entrance and, according to Frankie, they had to stand in line for two and a half hours before they could get admitted to the concert area. They had tickets - they also had sealed bottles of water and sealed snacks, and cell phones. The water and the snacks were confiscated and thrown on the ground. Frank said he saw hundreds of water bottles in the pile. Does the fact that the event was sponsored by a certain Energy Drink have anything to do with that? I suspect it does.

The boys had a great time. Frank was able to get into the mosh pit and he has the bruises to prove it. He almost caught a thrown drum stick too, but when he dived for it, it turned out to be a straw.

While the boys were in the midst of the throng of thousands, Nancy was cruising the Yorkdale Shopping Centre and I was at the Taste of The Danforth event. I met a friend there and we had a leisurely lunch and then checked out the street vendors. I took the subway back to Yorkdale and went on a search for a pay phone. It's harder than you might think to find one. There was a whole bank of them near the entrance and none were in service. I finally found one that worked and called Nancy on her cell phone. She was sitting in the car and described her location. It's a good thing she got out of the car and waved her arms, or I would never have spotted her.

We had dinner at the mall and checked on the boys again via cell phone. Then it was time to move the car to the Downsview subway station parking lot and wait. We could hear the thump of the band and I can vividly imagine how loud it was in the park. The boys had to walk from the park to the subway and they finally made it to the car just a little after midnight.

Frank told us that lots of people had weed and alcohol. I guess the security guards were not all that efficient. He also told us that the whole thing was like, like, awesome, eh, especially when Slipknot's drummer kept playing as his drum set turned upside down.

Someday the boys will be singing "wasn't that a time."

The Naked Writer, The Form, And Earl

2008-07-29T11:18:00.000-04:00

I have been reading, The Courage to Write by Ralph Keyes. If you haven't read it, I recommend it. The naked in my headline does not refer to a literal state of undress and although I often write in my pajamas, I haven't tried writing in the nude - yet. Instead, it refers to a writer's fear of revealing too much and suffering failure, censure or fill-in-your-worst-fear, as a consequence. The best fiction comes from peeling away the layers and getting as close as we can to the truth of the characters. Here's one quote I especially like -

"writers who hold their readers' attention are the ones who grab them by the lapel and say, 'You've got to listen to what I'm about to tell you.' It's hard to be that passionate. It means you must put your whole poke on the table."

And that, as they say - ain't easy because "the fear of revealing ourselves tends to be repressed." But, if we don't go into the dark places of the mind and soul and illuminate them, our writing will only feebly scratch at the surface.

I'm in one of those dark places at the moment, and maybe someday that will serve me in my writing, but right now I'm too pissed off to see that. In June, one of the staff at Service Canada assisted me with my application for the G.I.S. benefit. However, thanks to some sort of error, I've been judged ineligible. The income they say I'll get this year is almost twice what the true amount would be. So, I have to launch an appeal. I'll write all the information in a letter as well as filling out the parts of the form that I can decipher. Maybe that will work.

When I'm not doing the things I should be doing, I occasionally amuse myself by watching a certain reality television show. I could justify this to my friends who watch little or no television by saying I do it to learn about pop culture and the younger generation. That wouldn't be true though. I watch when I'm too whacked or too lazy to read or do anything productive. So, I've seen a couple of Canadian Idol episodes and I've become an Earl fan. He's unlikely to win because he's well, odd - and he doesn't look the part, but he's, like, totally real eh! It's likely that Mookie will win, but my heart is with big Earl, the goofy guy who's a true original.

Family Birthday Bashes and other Amusements

2008-07-15T13:01:00.000-04:00

My youngest grandson chose to have a Harvey's hamburger for his birthday dinner. After we had dined we returned to the house for the birthday cake ritual. The lights are turned off, the birthday honoree is sent out of the room and when the candles on the cake have been lighted he returns as everyone sings Happy Birthday to him. The ice cream cake was delicious and S. who is now fourteen said more than three words, which is unusual, and allowed his grandparents to hug him. He received a new dirt bike a couple of days before his birthday because there is a BMX track near the family campsite. Grandparents, uncles and aunts, gave him cash and as I understand it he wants to buy a better MP3 player, or whatever it is that has now replaced that gadget.

I received a surprise belated birthday present in the mail (a gift certificate). It was especially heartening to receive it during the week when I had to have a mammogram and a bone scan. I really hate having a mammogram, not only because it's painful but also because of my family history. I'm glad to say that nothing abnormal was found. The bone scan revealed that one side of my neck has more than the normal amount of bone loss. There are no problems anywhere else and that's weird. Pass me the cheese, please and of course, the calcium supplement. (I'm somewhat lactose intolerant, but cheese has an enzyme in it which helps - too bad ice cream doesn't).

Friday, I went down to King St. to watch all the classic cars cruise by. I was a bit early and looked for a place to sit. There are benches along King but all of them had been staked out. However, one bench was occupied only by a large rather intimidating man who was sitting right in the middle of it. So, I asked if I could share the bench. He turned out to be extremely knowledgeable about the cars and quite chatty. Agreeable company, nostalgia and gasoline fumes. What else could a woman who grew up spending her after-school hours in the Greyhound bus garage want?

And, in other people's news, my friend Lori now has her own website. You can find it here
http://www.lorihahnel.ca/

It's great!